Issue 36, Love, Sexuality, Singlehood

Love & Sexuality: How Do I Find Contentment In Singlehood?

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Love & Sexuality: How Do I Find Contentment In Singlehood?

“How do I find contentment in singlehood?” 

In my secondary school days, I was the kind of girl who could never go for long without being in a relationship. Over time, after going through multiple breakups and purposeless relationships I thought: “What is the point of being in relationships if they do not end in marriage?” The emotional issues I had to deal with each time a relationship ended were draining and affected me in unhelpful ways. This made me more cautious toward entering a relationship flippantly, and I started thinking about the purpose of relationships and marriage.

Contentment in singlehood begins when you have a personal conviction that have a personal conviction that you not need to be in a relationship to be happy. I learnt that no human being, not even the “right guy” can make me contented all the time. We are setting ourselves up for disappointment and heartbreak if we think romantic relationships complete us.

When my purpose in life was not fixated on finding love and happiness from being in a relationship, I found happiness from many more things. Spending time with good friends, having great conversations over meals, having fun singing (or screaming) crazily at karaoke, attending youth camps and interesting church workshops, pursuing my interest in soccer, and serving in my church’s children and youth ministries – these were memorable and meaningful things that made me thankful to be alive, happy and contented. What are some meaningful interests and activities you desire to pursue? God does bless you with seasons and opportunities to cultivate these interests and grow in your personal development and fulfilment.

Yes, at the end of the day, I still yearned for a relationship. But I was aware that my inner restlessness and emptiness could only be deeply touched when I spent time with God, whether it was in prayer, journalling, listening to Him from His Word, or soaking in His presence in worship. Pursue God-give opportunities, but spend time with Him daily, and let Him enrich your life greatly! Whatever your age, singlehood can definitely be a rich and deeply satisfying experience when you let God show you how fruitful it can be.

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