Courage – Kallos

I am Free

Alina Teo — Thu, 13 Nov 2025 11:40:27 +0000

What does it mean to be free?

When one thinks of freedom, it is often seen in the light of doing anything, any time, in any way one desires. But is this what freedom really looks like?

The Bible also points us to freedom. When Christ died on the cross, he chose to go to the cross despite the mockery, pain, despair and loneliness it cost him. And he did it for my liberty, your liberty — freedom from slavery to sin.

What does freedom really look like?

The promise

Paul in Galatians 3, talks about Jesus being the “seed” or offspring of Abraham through whom God’s promise to bless all the nations will be fulfilled.

God did not forget this promise. He was bringing it all to pass in his perfect timing and wisdom. His promise was fulfilled through Jesus and that fulfilment has brought us liberty.

What for?

Yet, this freedom that has been bought by Christ and received through faith is not for me to do as I wish. In this freedom, I am to love God and love others. As Paul declares in Galatians 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

In this freedom, I am to love God and love others.

It is a freedom led by the Spirit that produces the fruit of righteousness. So perhaps a question we need to constantly ask ourselves is — “Am I producing the fruit of the Spirit in my life?”

What does this look like in our everyday life?

we can choose

Paul gives us a good vision for this in Galatians 5:13-14 where he encourages us to “serve one another humbly in love”. Perhaps by looking at the fruit of the Spirit described in Galatians 5:22-23, we get a better glimpse into what it looks like to put love into action in our daily lives.

Galatians 5:13-14 encourages us to “serve one another humbly in love”.

We can choose …

To love when we have been hurt.

To be joyful in the little or more that we have.

To choose peace and not wage wars or easily find fault.

To be long-suffering when we face seasons when nothing seems to be going our way.

To be kind, when unkindness is on the tip of our tongues.

To choose goodness, even when we are unfairly treated.

To be faithful at home, at work, in relationships.

To be gentle; rebuking in love but affirming and reconciling in grace.

To have self-control, fleeing temptations and turning to Christ for help.

Our freedom has been bought for us by the blood of Christ. Let’s not waste this freedom but live wisely loving God and loving others.

Finding My Purpose And Remaining Faithful In Sports – Chui Ling Goh Shares Her Story

Kallos Team — Mon, 30 Oct 2023 11:10:00 +0000

Having been involved in sports since an early age and going on to represent Singapore in the SEA Games, Chui Ling Goh pens her own journey and shares what God has been teaching her through sports.

WHO AM I?

It has been 17 years since I started high-performance sports. As a young 13-year-old girl in a neighbourhood school, I was looking for my individual identity, innate self-worth, and unique passions in life. My parents and sisters were my role models, but they were not … me. I sought myself and it might take a lifetime for me to say I truly know who God has created me to be, but through sports, I have gotten glimpses of the glory of the Lord and the individualised journey He has for me. In brief, God took my personal passions and adapted it for His plans, and I find myself going through a journey of faith to remain faithful to Him in a world that denies Him.

Through sports, I have gotten glimpses of the glory of the Lord
and the individualised journey He has for me.

SPORTS AND ME

To say I was created to do sports is an understatement. I come from an extraordinarily sporty family and was born with a competitive spirit. I was identified by teachers and coaches in schools for my inclination towards sports, and even out-sported my male classmates from a young age. At the age of 15 after entering the national youth squad, with no structured training, I was invited to train with (and eventually invited to attend) one of the top junior colleges in Singapore. When I was 19, I was invited to apply (and was eventually offered) the inaugural sports scholarship with National University of Singapore, when I also joined the national senior squad. By the age of 24, I was offered jobs based on my affiliation with sports, on the condition that I continue sports.

Through the different stages of my life, I contemplated and even took steps to leave sports, but sports always found me. When I was 26, I decided that I was going to retire from competitive sports because I started work as a lawyer and the pressures of my legal career felt too much for me to bear. But my legal mentor and coaches around me decided that it was not the end of my sporting career and tussled me out of retirement. I struggled and wrestled like Jacob wrestled with the Lord (Gen 32:22–32), but I relented when I learnt that it was not just God who wanted me in sports but that I myself had a grave passion for sports that I could no longer deny. I learnt that I loved running. I learnt that I was running not because I had to continue my commitment with the national team, or because I wanted to keep my scholarship or financial opportunities with sports. I learnt that despite the ups and downs in my life, I loved running. It brought me unspeakable joy and a sense of achievement that I could not find in other areas of my life.

THE STRUGGLE

However, through the many years of being in sports and despite being connected to various sports ministries (like Cru Athletes in Action), I struggled to comprehend and align the demands of high-performance sports together with God’s plan and purpose (for me) in sports. I had two deep-seated intellectual and spiritual struggles with sports and God:

What is God’s purpose in the physical pain of high-performance sports that I go through regularly, and how am I supposed to find God within?
How can I juggle the innate and common-place self-centredness in high-performance sports that is antithetical to God’s call for us to love and honour others (Luke 6:35)?

If I am not able to be good, or practise godly values in the field of sports, am I deserving of being a witness for the Lord? The lack of alignment between sports and God in my life saw me retract many times back to my shell, feeling undeserving of my spot in sports on the one hand, and lacking purpose and intentionality in sports, on the other.

SEA GAMES 2023

In 2023, after years of a dull life in sports,the Lord intervened. It started with my 1500m event at the South-East Asian (SEA) Games, when things went beyond my control and spiralled. The schedule of my events was changing multiple times at the eleventh hour, causing additional stress and anxiety on my already pressured body. On top of the additional stress, I struggled deeply with sleep the night before due to external factors, like the random beeping of a smoke detector running out of battery. I went into the competition like a zombie, feeling defeated, only to experience God in a measure that I did not foresee. At the end of the race, I clinched the bronze medal in the 1500m event. It was a miracle. The run became my testimony, and the Lord assured me that despite my inability to find purpose and self-worth in sports (yet, then), I had work to do there, and He was honouring my passion in running.

The run became my testimony, and the Lord assured me
that despite my inability to find purpose
and self-worth in sports (yet, then),
I had work to do there, and He was honouring my passion in running.

DEALING WITH MY HEART

Over the next few months, the Lord unravelled my approaches to sports and broke down deep strongholds I have had about sports and pain which had hindered me in my pursuit of sports. On many levels, I lacked the focus and will to be the head and not the tail (Deut 28:13). With the intellectual and spiritual struggles I have had with having a sporting career as a follower of Christ, I felt that I lacked the dignity and grace in sports that the Lord had bethrew me with (Prov 31:25–31). But now, I run more sober and clear-headed than ever before (1 Pet 1:13) — to make space to run with the bravery and courage that God has called me to run with (Josh 1:9), and run for and towards God through pain.

But now, I run more sober and clear-headed than ever before
… run for and towards God through pain.

ROLE MODELS IN SPORTS

But beyond my personal experiences, I saw the way in sports through other godly witnesses. I saw how it is entirely possible to be a world-class athlete without being selfish or self-glorifying. Athletes like Allyson Felix (USA), Sydney McLaughlin-Levrone (USA) and Nicola Olyslagers (Australia) have approached world-class sports selflessly, to be antithetical to the norm of the self-centredness of performance sports. Since top Christian athletes like them are able to practise their craft without being selfish and still reach the top of their sport, I do not need to conform to the selfish ways of the world in order to reach the top of my sport. To inherit the legacy of those who came before me is such a privilege; being able to run with the forerunners called by the Lord. I have accepted that I was not created to bear the glory of the world, and that gives me true freedom to run my best.

I do not need to conform to the selfish ways of the world
in order to reach the top of my sport.

RUNNING FORWARD

When I was learning to be a Christian athlete, I was taught that I had to use the platform I was given to be a witness for the Lord (Matt 28:16–20, Isa 43:10). After years of wrestling intellectually with my purpose in sports for the Lord, I have structured three main dimensions of work for myself in sports. I call them P2P³:

Platform to PRAY: Remembering my motivations and the Giver of my talents.
Platform to PERFORM: Do not be lazy but do the hard work, and fight for my platform and influence, without losing sight of being a gracious competitor.
Platform to PREACH: Give thanks for the talent and acknowledge that I am stewarding the talent I have been entrusted with. Be a witness to the Giver of my talents and the right motivation for sports.

These areas of work align my motivation and conduct to those of the Lord’s, in a world that does not acknowledge His existence and value. With these, I find my passion and conduct aligned and properly ordered with my spirit and godly values, allowing me the freedom and liberty to run my best for the Lord. This is how I choose to remain faithful in sports.

Navigating Through the Storms of Life

Aarksara Foo — Wed, 01 Sep 2021 15:03:00 +0000

Over the years, I have learned that just because we have accepted Jesus as our Lord and Saviour doesn’t mean that we are exempt from the fires and storms of this life. As John 16:33 shows us, Jesus has already given us a heads-up — in this world we will experience trouble, but take heart for He has overcome it all. What good news!

How do I keep breathing when everything around me seems chaotic and unresolvable? How can there be any good that comes out of horrible situations?

I have had these questions circulate in my mind when the gap between my expectations of how things should be and my current reality seemed far too wide for God to rescue me out of my disappointments.

But God has always rescued me. Failed relationships, broken promises, unpredictable circumstances in business, problems that arise within the ministry … when the gap between my expectations and my reality is large, Jesus has always come to fill that gap with His grace, love, and peace.

We all have experienced disappointment. I fell very ill in my final year of university. I had hopes and dreams to get a graduate job and start earning a stable income. But I became too unwell to even go for any job interviews. I started questioning why God would allow me to go through this. All the years of hard work to finally graduate came to a halt. I was deeply disappointed that my life felt like it had come to a dead end.

Little did I know, God was actually birthing something far greater than I could have ever imagined. I started writing songs and gaining more skills and knowledge in the area of vocals and songwriting. From there, doors to opportunities flung open and I was catapulted into God’s purposes for my life.

So how do we respond when the expectation and reality gap is far too big for us to comprehend? How do we make it through these storms of life? I have learned that the first thing to do is to run to Jesus. How? Pray. Talk to Him. Cry out to Him, plainly and simply, just as you are. He listens. Prayer is like a phone call to God; the line is always open. Tell Him how you’re feeling, and let out the confusion, the hurt, and the pain that seems unbearable.

Secondly, worship. Wherever you are, whatever worship looks like to you, worship! I found that switching on worship music in the background helped me. I felt like I was having a church service right in my bedroom. The presence of God calmed my spirit and helped me see the situation through His eyes instead of through the lens of bitterness.

The third step is to talk to people you trust. I talked to people I love and I know love me back. I spoke as honestly as I could about the struggles going on in my life, my mind, and my heart. Such clarity and revelation were brought forth when I was honest with my inner circle.

My friend, whatever you’re going through right now, whether it be good or bad, I encourage you to cling on to Jesus with everything you have. Allow Him to be your anchor as you weather the storms in your life. His plans are far better than we could ever imagine, pray or hope for. His heart for us is to be whole and healthy — physically, emotionally and spiritually.

PRAYER
Father God, please help me to walk through every season of life with You. Help me to trust that You know far better than I do. Lord, may You hold my hand every step of the way. Amen.

REFLECTION TIME
1. What storms are you currently walking through? How have you been responding to them?
2. Who can you call today to be completely honest with your feelings?

DELVE DEEPER
Read these passages to dive deeper into ‘Navigating Through the Storms of Life’:
o Romans 8:28
o Isaiah 55:8–9

SONGSPO:
‘Battle Belongs’ by Phil Wickham

Isabelle Lim: Deaf but Not Disabled

Quek Shiwei — Mon, 01 Mar 2021 07:18:00 +0000

Prior to meeting Isabelle, I was worried that parts of our conversation would be lost in translation as I do not know sign language. My worries were uncalled for. Her mother, Isabelle’s sign language interpreter, joined us and I watched how Isabelle’s mother patiently and swiftly signed Isabelle’s responses to my questions. Sometimes, she even completed Isabelle’s sentences before Isabelle finished signing. The close bond they share is undeniable; Isabelle teased her mum’s photo-taking skills with eye-rolls, and her mum would retort back playfully. While Isabelle and I could not converse verbally, her heart and passion for photography was heard loud and clear. Isabelle might be small-built, but she definitely has a larger than life personality. If I could describe her with two words, they would be “tenacious” and “inspiring.” Read on to find out more!

What are the earliest memories of your childhood?
My life started with an eight-month stay in the hospital. I have plenty of memories of hospital stays, visitations, check-ups, and different therapy sessions. But it’s not a painful memory as my parents gave me a happy childhood.

My parents sent me to different courses to learn art and drama. One of my happiest memories is an art course that I attended from four to ten years old. I felt like I was transported into another world full of creativity.

Have you been treated differently because of how you look or because you can’t hear?
I have eight fingers but people don’t realise it at first glance. My arms can’t be fully extended too. With new people, often times, the conversation starters are about my physical challenges and photography journey. I think because I do many things like others — writing, typing, eating, walking, photography — my disability isn’t that obvious.

DEAFNESS IS AN INVISIBLE DISABILITY.

What are some of the most awkward situations you have been in because people didn’t realise you are deaf?
Deafness is an invisible disability. Also, I don’t wear a hearing aid, so it isn’t obvious.

I have to use my phone to communicate my food orders. Sometimes I get wrong orders when I try gesturing, especially to elderly servers who don’t understand gestures or read English.

When people ask me for directions, they often say “Sorry!” and walk away when I tell them I’m deaf and I may need them to repeat themselves. There’s nothing to be sorry about; just text or write it out and ask me again.

I LEARNT NOT TO BE AFRAID OF MY DISABILITY... IT CAN BE MY STRENGTH.

When I meet new people, it can be a little awkward when they speak to me or speak without looking at me. I can attempt lip-reading but I may miss parts or most of the message. It’s even more challenging now with Covid-19! With people wearing masks, I can’t rely on lip-reading at all. Sometimes people also forget to gesture despite knowing I’m deaf.

Was befriending others in school a struggle for you?
Not really. As the only deaf student attending art classes with a small group of hearing students, everyone learnt together. Perhaps the children were young then and didn’t see any difference between us. I attended Singapore School For The Deaf in my primary school years. Everyone could sign so it was easy to understand each other.

I was thankful that in secondary school and LASALLE College of the Arts, I was never bullied. I was thought to be easy-going and approachable. Initially, classmates didn’t know how to approach me. I had to show them by typing, writing, or phone messaging. I had to break the ice first.

In secondary school, I was also thankful that there was a small group of deaf people spread out across different year groups. All of us could help each other.

How did you grow to become comfortable and confident in your own skin?
I had to accept myself first before others could accept me, and love myself before loving others. I learnt not to be afraid of my disability. It is not only my weakness, it can also be my strength. It just depends on how I view my disability; I don’t allow others to define my disability.

How did you turn your disability into your strength?
Sometimes I forget that I am deaf; I see myself as the same as others. But when there’s something I cannot do, then I realise that I am different. But that doesn’t stop me from trying to find a way to do it. My parents also remind me that I am uniquely different. They sent me to different courses like art, drama, dance, and sports for exposure. Every experience boosted my confidence. I stopped viewing my disability as a weakness but I started seeing the strengths I had, such as in photography. If it weren’t for the confidence built up over the years, I might not have been that adventurous to pick up photography in my later years.

I also cling on to the verses in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. I’ve always remembered the phrases “My strength is made perfect in weakness” and “For when I am weak, then I am strong.” It’s pretty much my life motto, and reminds me to depend on God for all things.

What inspired you to pick up photography?
I was inspired by my deaf primary school teacher. He was a photography hobbyist. He would show our class photos from school events after major examinations. We would all be laughing at the candid and “unglam” moments; it brought so much joy to our class.

Photography started out as a fun hobby but gradually, I started volunteering as an event photographer in school. I also participated in photography competitions and won an award. I started to post my photos on Facebook. One day, my uncle asked my mum if I had been looking though photography books. He told my mum that one of the very simple images of raindrops I captured was similar to a photo he saw in a museum taken by a renowned photographer! He told my mum to watch out for me as I might have some talent in photography.

Why did you decide to pursue photography as a career?
I remember school events where plenty of people were talking and I felt out of place and excluded. However, through taking photos, it felt like I was entering their world and I could connect with them and “hear” their conversations.

After attending the Institute of Technical Education (ITE), I was at a crossroads. Should I go to a polytechnic to pursue a diploma in accounting and have a stable job, or go to LASALLE for photography despite being unsure of where it would take me? I was praying to God to help me choose which path to take, and I experienced this peace when I chose to go to LASALLE. I wasn’t so keen to work from 9-5. I like to move around on the job. My job now gives me that freedom and I love that every job I take is unique. I believe God knows all that was on my heart, hence He led me to LASALLE to hone my skills.

PEOPLE SEE MY ABILITIES THROUGH MY PHOTOS; MY DISABILITIES AREN’T VISIBLE TO THEM.

After graduating from LASELLE, I started shooting. From 2016 till pre-Covid, I was mostly doing event photography but was moving towards family, portrait, wedding, and maternity shoots too.

What are some challenges you encounter on shoots since you aren’t able to communicate with your subjects verbally?
In some shoots where a lot of subjects are present, it does get overwhelming because there are many things to take note of. Before shoots, I will liaise with my subjects through text messaging or email to get to know them better. I prepare photo references and go through them with my mum. I will highlight key words of what I want to capture.

During the shoot, I sign the keywords to my mum. She roughly knows what poses I want and communicates that to the subjects, saying things like “Issy is going a little closer to you,” “Stay in your poses while Issy shoots a few more photos,” and more.

What is the most fulfilling part of your work as a photographer?
Making my clients smile when they look at the images I capture. When I did event photography, clients did not realise that I am deaf and that I was the one taking the photos. In a way, people see my abilities through my photos; my disabilities aren’t visible to them.

Fill in the blank. “To me, God is ____.” Why did you choose that word?
Faithful. Because His love and faith in us is unending. There are times we doubt ourselves. But God knows our abilities best, even better than our parents on earth! He is the author of our lives. How can we doubt God’s faith in us?

*This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

I Failed ‘O’ Level English!

Joey Tay — Fri, 01 Jan 2021 13:02:00 +0000

I still remember the day, sitting anxiously in the school hall as we waited for our ‘O’ level results. When my turn came, the look on my teachers’ faces was one I can never forget. They handed me my results slip and different polytechnic course brochures, as well as a private diploma brochure. Something wasn’t right.

26 points.

Out of the seven subjects I took, I scored D7 in English, B3 in Literature, and C5s and C6s for the rest. I was flooded with anger, disappointment, and frustration with myself and with God. How could this be happening? How could I fail my English paper and get the highest grade out of all my subjects in Literature? The irony stared me in the face.

The worst thing was knowing that failing the English paper meant that I could not enter most courses in a polytechnic. Entering my dream school and course suddenly became impossible.

I eventually enrolled in a private university in a course I liked, but I kept all the course brochures I had collected from the different polytechnics in a drawer. For four years, I lived in shame and guilt. Whenever someone mentioned their grades, I found myself moving away or feeling depressed. I was ashamed of my results and didn’t want to tell anyone about it. There were times when I was home alone at night and was reminded about my bad results. I would open the drawer, sit on the floor and cry.

When I was 20, God healed me from the pain that I endured silently for four years. I remember coming home one day after listening to a sermon that spoke to my heart. I emptied the drawer, and threw all the course brochures away. That day, I felt so relieved and free, and I knew it was God who had given me the courage to let all my shame, disappointment, and pain go.

As I look back now, I see that just because my path was different, it doesn’t mean that I was lost or abandoned. God was and is in full control of my life, and my journey was no mistake. While I did not have the chance to experience life in a polytechnic or junior college, I was surrounded with classmates much older than me, and from different countries, which forced me to think and act more maturely. I was part of a Christian community in school and joined a discipleship group. I wasn’t exposed to friends who enjoyed clubbing, drinking, or speaking vulgarities. It was as if God was protecting me and sheltering me in a safe environment.

Someone once told me, “Age does not define your maturity, grades do not define your intelligence, and rumours do not define who you are.” God made us in His image and we are who He has called us to be. Nothing should make us feel unworthy or lousy about ourselves, especially not our grades. Understand, dear friend, that you are the Heavenly Father’s precious daughter, and you are loved even when you feel you have failed!

Cherlyn Oh: Just An Ordinary Girl

Quek Shiwei — Fri, 01 Jan 2021 08:54:00 +0000

What do you think of when you hear the word “missionary”? Brave? More spiritual than others? A “superior Christian”? Cherlyn Oh, a missionary in Bangkok, doesn’t see it that way. Initially located in Chiang Rai for two years, a visa issue eventually led Cherlyn to an opening in Bangkok to do student ministry, where she has now been for five years. As Christian students are the minority in Thailand, she saw the pressing need to help university students grow in their faith and fulfil their call to be a salt and light, such that they can be a big positive influence in the society. Read on to find out how this “ordinary girl” left the shores of Singapore to be a missionary in Thailand!

Hi Cherlyn! How did your interest in missions begin?
It was actually from my dad. He used to serve on the Operation Mobilisation Logos ship before he got married. When I was a child, he would bring the family on the ship when it docked in Singapore. I also read books on Hudson Taylor, a British missionary to China, and my curiosity was piqued. After taking my ‘O’ levels, I went on my first short-term mission trip with my church to Chiang Rai. That grew the desire to find out more about Thai culture and missions in general.

How can a regular individual get involved in helping to abolish human trafficking? What did you do to prepare yourself for mission work?
I was actually trained as a social worker! When I worked as a social worker, I managed my cases using counselling theories and social work tools, and while they were useful, I was not able to openly share about Jesus in a secular environment. At one point I thought, “Actually, Jesus is the only one who can bring true healing to these families I am working with.” I wondered how I could integrate my faith and skill sets to meet people’s needs in deeper ways. Missions seemed like a platform for me to do that.

I became more involved in my home church, read more about missions, and talked to missionaries I knew. After I resigned, I went to Bible school. In the process, I had opportunities to get more contacts about possible places to go to or agencies to join. I continued to go on short-term mission trips and prayed about my next steps. I talked to family, pastors, and missionaries about what they thought. I also asked them, “What are my strengths?”, and “What should my direction be?”

I WONDERED HOW I COULD INTEGRATE MY FAITH AND SKILL SETS TO MEET PEOPLE’S NEEDS IN DEEPER WAYS.

What convicted you to “take the plunge” and commit to it entirely?
Eventually, several people (spiritual leaders and mentors) affirmed my decision. Since I studied Thai in university, I decided to go to Thailand.

My parents are Christians, but they weren’t super keen about me becoming a full-time missionary even though my dad was the one who “triggered” the missions desire. They suggested for me to go for short-term trips instead but not physically relocate there.

There were two things I was praying for as confirmation that I was making the right decision. The first was for my parents to give me their blessings. I was also praying that someone would take over my role in my home church. When I was finishing Bible school, I talked to my parents and they reluctantly gave their blessings with the condition that I was with a trusted organisation and was contactable. I went for a short trip to India thereafter and some hiccups occurred. I missed my connecting flight from Mumbai to Singapore and had to stay overnight at the airport with five Indian men in the same plight. My mum was worried because the New Delhi gang rape that happened in 2012 was a big news then. But God used those five men to take care of me well. They looked out for me, and one of them talked his way into getting us on board a Singapore Airlines flight at 10.30 the next morning instead of having to wait 24 hours for the next flight.

When I came back, I overheard some church aunties saying to my mum, “Aiya, why did you allow your daughter to go to India?” My mum responded, “God will take care of her.” I was touched that God was giving my parents peace. He also sent someone who willingly volunteered to take over my ministry role! With God answering both my prayers, it was a sign for me to go ahead.

HONESTLY, I WASN’T 100% SURE BUT IT LOOKED LIKE GOD WAS ALLOWING ME TO TAKE THIS NEXT STEP INTO MISSIONS.

How did people respond when you told them your decision?
There were mixed responses. Christian friends felt a little sad that I would be absent in church. Pre-believing friends were confused because it was the age to build a career instead.

Spiritual mentors and those in the mission field concurred that it was a great idea. But some in church commented, “We would rather you serve in church.” Some challenged me with, “Are you sure God really called you to go? Which Bible verse did you receive? Why are you so sure?” Honestly, I wasn’t 100% sure but it looked like God was allowing me to take this next step into missions. Enough people were supportive for me to not waver and to proceed.

What are some misconceptions about missionaries that you’ve realised are untrue?
I thought that I would be going to the market daily and giving out tracts to people. But such methods are not appropriate in Thailand. People are more open to relationship building before listening to what you say.

People often think missions is about going to a rural place, staying there alone and doing everything yourself. My dad also thought that I had to preach every Sunday. I don’t. We believe in partnering and discipling the local church or even teaching English or music to pre-believers and forming bonds with them.

The 21st century mission field is different from the past. Missions can also be helping to home school missionaries’ kids, manage financial accounts, or helping the missionaries with publicity to mobilise greater traction.

What is it like being a single woman in the mission field?
When I was in Chiang Rai, I underestimated the value of community. In Singapore, it was naturally available to me. It took me a while to realise I was lonely. I missed having my family around, friends who asked me out spontaneously, and even speaking Singlish with people in the same culture. I didn’t realise that all these nuances mattered!

I was also the only single in the team. In team meetings, the men would plan strategies and the ladies would talk about kitchen adventures or their children. I didn’t know if I should sit with the men or the ladies, or where I would fit in better. I felt out of place.

I was relatively young then so people in the village thought, “She’s just a girl and isn’t married yet.” I don’t get taken as seriously as an older man or a married woman.

During my loneliness, it made me wonder if I should settle down and find a husband. Whilst I was open to that, I was more aware that I am ultimately complete in Christ, regardless of my marital status.

GOD USES ORDINARY PEOPLE LIKE ME TO FULFIL HIS PURPOSES IN EXTRAORDINARY WAYS.

What final encouragement do you have for our readers?
I once went to share about missions at a local church and the pastor commented that I looked like an ordinary girl. Some people thought that wasn’t a nice thing to say.

But I knew what he meant and he was right. I am really am an ordinary girl, and God uses ordinary people like me to fulfil His purposes in extraordinary ways. As long as you are willing and available to follow His leading, He can and will use you for His glory and to be a blessing too!

WHAT SHOULD A TEEN GIRL DO TO PREPARE HERSELF FOR LONG-TERM OVERSEAS MISSIONS?

1. Pray and take steps to find out about the specific burdens you have for a country, people group or certain social issue.

2. Talk to people who know you and spiritual leaders who can give you honest feedback on the journey leading towards a possible future as a missionary.

3. Go on short-term mission trips.

4. Be involved locally in the meantime if that people group is already present in Singapore.

Surviving My Mental Health Struggle For 7 Years

Jane — Wed, 13 May 2020 14:27:00 +0000

I’ve survived my struggle with mental health for seven years.

I am a visual storyteller, a singer who loves to dance, and a film enthusiast. At 15, I was diagnosed with panic disorder, and at 18, my psychiatrist suggested that I may have dysthymia, a high functioning form of depression.

I remember times when I would lie on the floor in my room for ages, and stare blankly at the ceiling. I once realised that I could not really walk in a straight line on my way home from school. I was light-headed and my chest felt blocked, to the point that every breath of air was hard to take.

I knelt in the secret space of my room countless times, crying out to God for the grace to endure my struggles. However, it came to the point where I could not see any reason or purpose in persevering through life. Outwardly I showed faith; however, on the inside, I became angry and eventually bitter towards God.

I was hurt by comments like, “It’s okay, it’s just a phase”; “God says do not be anxious about anything …”; the worst was from one of my closest friends, who said, “Don’t you know that you are diverting the attention away from friends who really need it?” These were ‘Good Christian Girls’, but through my journey of healing and self-discovery, I realised that even saints are not perfect, so I have given those wounds to God. But I went on to poly thinking that what I had experienced, like what these people said, was “just a phase”.

However, the panic attacks only became stronger and I was no match to fight against them. My depressive symptoms started showing up in Year 2 of poly, when my body finally gave way to my dwindling mental state.

After five years of listening to well-meaning but unhelpful advice, I eventually snapped. As a result, I took two semesters off from school in mid 2018. Counselling, medication and the empathy of amazing, God-sent people helped me to get my engine going and move again. The process of struggle and recovery is still ongoing and some days I feel that I am getting better, while on others I feel like I am not.

One misconception about counselling is that you will see the results the moment you start going. However, my counsellor said that most clients only see progress by their eighth session or after! I used to feel drained after each therapy session, as I felt that I needed to keep talking about my life to my counsellor. However, recently, I felt comforted by her when she told me reassuringly, “You know, you don’t have to speak. Would you like me to leave the room for a while for you to rest?” I was shocked and touched, but I kept a poker face. I’ve realised that healing can take time and is an arduous process, but I have also learnt to be patient and kind toward myself.

I sometimes feel like I am fighting a losing battle. But I think that’s where the beauty lies — my inner turmoil has pushed me closer instead of further from God. In my weakness, I am forced to run to Him. I am reminded that He is holding me. I may have to live with this for my whole life. But you know what? I will live this life ‘breath by breath’, knowing that each breath I take, whether painful or not, is given by Him — and if He allows me to have that breath, then His story for me is definitely not finished yet.

Why Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

Christiana Chan — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

“I wish I was wasn’t born into this family!”

“I wish we were never friends!”

“I wish I could cut off ties with you!”

In the heat of the moment, we often utter the above phrases or simply conjure up the thought when we argue with friends or family (I admit I do it too!). We’re so riled up with anger that we speak whatever is on our mind and whatever helps us to escape from losing the argument. We never apologise either, thinking that time will heal and help us to forget and move on. However, we continue bearing the grudges, the hurt, and the memories of our argument, even years on.

It is in moments like these where SORRY becomes the most powerful word in unleashing forgiveness and maintaining our relationships with people.

It is a simple, five-letter word.

Yet, it is often the hardest word to utter with sincerity. How many times do we say sorry and actually mean it? Do we say sorry for being late to a meeting? Do we say sorry for wrongfully accusing someone? Do we say sorry for words that have hurt people? We rarely do — what more when we think we’re right? However, when we utter this simple word and mean it, we realise that it takes humility to admit we’re wrong, courage to put others first, and maturity to admit responsibility for what we have done!

THE COURAGE TO BE HUMBLED

I’m sure many of us have been hurt by the words and actions of others. Joseph was no different in this respect!

When he was just 17 years old, Joseph’s brothers plotted to kill him (Gen 37:18–20).They stripped him and threw him into a pit where there was no water (Gen 37:23–24). They even lied to Jacob, their father, that Joseph was devoured by an animal, when in fact they had sold him off to Ishmaelites (Gen 37:27–28)!

Chapters later in the book of Genesis, we read about how the guilt of such treachery against Joseph ate at their conscience (Gen 42:21). Their confession of wrongdoing led Joseph to weep (Gen 42:24)!

Will we allow someone to close a chapter of hurt in their lives through our courage to say a simple apology?

Just as how Joseph needed to hear that his brothers were sorry about the wrong they did to him, our friends or family might also need to hear a simple “I’m sorry” to move on from the hurt that we have caused them. By courageously apologising and mending a broken relationship, you could bring healing to both them and yourself today!

THE COURAGE TO PUT OTHERS FIRST

When we apologise, we also put other people’s feelings and emotions above our own. You may feel that you are right, or even that you have nothing to apologise for, but putting others first means that we humble ourselves and say sorry anyway for whatever hurt we may have unknowingly caused. As Philippians 2:3–4 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others”.

I’VE COME TO REALISE THAT SAYING SORRY ISN’T ABOUT ME, ME, AND ME. IT HAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE ABOUT OTHERS

As teenagers, our quick tongue retorts or talks back to whatever our parents say. I talked back to my parents so often as a teen that they thought I would become a lawyer in the future! However, have we thought about the hurt that we might actually be causing them with our supposedly quick-witted words of rebellion? Have we thought about things from the perspectives of our parents? I’ve come to realise that saying sorry isn’t about me, me, and me. It has and always will be about others!

I recently watched a TED talk by Shann Ray Ferch, a writer who focuses on forgiveness studies, about an incident with his wife’s family. Once, his father-in-law made a sharp remark to his wife, which Ferch did not even think was particularly harsh. However, later in the evening, his father-in-law came and apologised to Ferch, which confused him. When Ferch insisted he did not have to apologise for anything, his father-in-law said: “In our family, we ask forgiveness of the person that we harmed, and also everybody else that was there in order to restore the dignity of the one that was harmed.”

Ferch’s story inspires me to not merely apologise for the sake of apologising, but to genuinely apologise for the wrong I have done. Just like Philippians 2:3–4, it inspires me to think of the feelings of the people I’ve hurt and put their feelings above my own selfishness and reluctance to say “I’m sorry”.

THE COURAGE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

Moreover, saying a simple “I’m sorry” signifies that we willingly take a part of the blame.

I clearly remember the days of a breakup, when my boyfriend cheated on me with another girl. It broke my heart and left me in pain, leaving me to grapple with the broken shards. I hated seeing his face, and I hated having to work with him.

The closure of this chapter in my life came with his apology while I was on a mission trip to Thailand. That simple phrase, “I’m sorry”, ministered so deeply to me and helped me to move on. I felt my heart grow lighter as God allowed all the bitterness to wash away I knew it wasn’t easy for him to say it. The amount of guilt that weighed on his heart must have become lighter upon saying those two words and admitting the mistake that he had made. Since then, we’ve chosen forgiveness and put aside our bitterness and resentment and continue to be friends today.

I FELT MY HEART TO GROW LIGHTER AS GOD ALLOWED ALL THE BITTERNESS TO WASH AWAY

When we own up to a mistake and apologise, a great burden is lifted off us, but also from others.

TWO SIMPLE WORDS

It’s never easy to release healing to someone who has hurt you or whom you’ve hurt. But that’s why we also do need an extra ounce of courage from God to step out of our comfort zone to do what is right and needed rather than inhabit our own bubble. Will you willingly take God’s hand to step out and apologise today?

Out Of The Harbor

Jiamin Choo — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

“Jiamin, what will you do in the future?” many asked during my third year in university. Should I enter the corporate world like most of my peers? Pursue further studies? Or respond to the growing desire in my heart — to offer God my first fruits after graduation by serving as a missionary onboard OM’s ship Doulos in obedience to God’s call on my life? I had never felt so torn and afraid.

Singapore had been like a harbour — a place of refuge, comfort, and security. I was on the route to obtaining a degree that would open doors to a well-paying job to provide for my widowed mum and younger siblings.

Standing at life’s crossroad, there was nothing I wanted more than to serve God in missions. However, the cost was high. If I were to obey the Heavenly Captain’s call, it would mean sailing away from these safe shores, leaving my loved ones behind, and having an uncertain future.

My biggest fear was what others would think of me. Some said, “You’re the eldest child. If you go on the Doulos, what’ll happen to your ageing mother? You’re supposed to take care of the family.” Some thought I was brave to go alone. Others were concerned I wouldn’t be receiving a salary and advised me to work for a few years before joining Doulos. There were nights when I cried silently, wrestling with God about the fear of being misunderstood as an unfilial daughter.

In such a time, I was reminded of how Peter walked on water toward Jesus (Matt 14:22–33). In the midst of winds and waves, when Peter saw Jesus walking on water toward the disciples’ boat, he dared to ask, “Lord, if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water (v. 28).” At Jesus’ command, “Come,” Peter obediently climbed out of the boat, felt the cold waves under his feet, and walked toward Jesus in faith (v. 29).

Peter’s eyes were fixed on Jesus who called him. He was the One whom Peter witnessed the previous day feeding over 5,000 people with five loaves and two fishes (Matt 14:13–21). This was the same Jesus who healed his mother-in-law by ordering the fever to leave her (Matt 8:14–15). Surely Jesus can keep Peter walking on water.

Things were going well until reality hit. The gusty wind got the experienced fisherman’s attention and steered his focus off Jesus. Fear overtook faith, and Peter started sinking. But as he cried for help, Jesus immediately reached out and caught Peter. When they got into the boat safely, the wind died down.

Like Peter who got out of his boat at the call of Jesus, I was stepping out of my comfort zone to obey God’s missions call. Like Peter whose faith was shaken by the wind, I had taken my eyes off God and allowed the fear of what others were thinking to overwhelm me. But how comforting to know that despite my little faith, God’s merciful and powerful presence gives courage.

I recalled how God had taken care of my family by providing loved ones to help with finances after my father passed away. I remembered how my identity is anchored in Christ, and not in what others say about me. Surely God can enable me to serve Him in missions, and also watch over my family, friendships, and future.

In faith, I surrendered my fears to the Heavenly Captain who had called me, and followed Him out of the harbour and onboard the Doulos. I sailed for four years to 31 countries, bringing a message of hope in Christ, and learning to love the world beyond my shore, one port at a time. If I could live my life all over again, would I still have chosen this path? Yes, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Because there is no greater joy than obeying my God, being where He calls me to be, doing what He calls me to do.

“A ship is safe in harbour, but that’s not what ships are for.” — William Shedd

REFLECTION TIME
1. What are some fears that you wrestle with? How do you usually deal with fear?
2. Are you willing to surrender your fears to God, trusting Him to take care of you and the things/people you care about? Why, or why not?

DELVE DEEPER
Read and reflect on these passages about courage:
o Esther 4
o Psalm 27
o Acts 4:1–31

HANDLES
Try reading the Bible in different translations for a richer understanding of God’s Word! While the word-for-word translations emphasise the original text’s literal wording (e.g. ESV, NASB, etc.), the thought-for-thought translations aim to keep the original text’s in-tended meaning (e.g. NIV NLT, etc.).

When Things Change, God Remains

Jiamin Choo — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 16:00:00 +0000

It was my first week in my dream school. I was no longer a Secondary Four student in a girls’ school, but one of the new J1s at junior college (JC). I felt nervous and lost, wondering, “Will I be happy here? Who will I make new friends with? Ooh … that guy looks cute! Is he looking at me? The school workload seems stressful … am I good enough to do well in my studies?”

After an orientation where we rolled in the mud during war games, learned mass dances, and bonded over a campfire, I started to like being in this school. The initial fears I had about transitioning to JC life disappeared. I began to feel like I belonged, and I was happy with the way things were. I wished nothing would ever change.

But the dreaded day came when we received our ‘O’ level results. Back then, there were two intakes for students, one in January that was based on our preliminary exam results, and another in March based on our ‘O’ level results. Even though I got a number of ‘A’s, it wasn’t enough to stay in the Science stream. I was crushed. Where would I go? To a new school and start all over again? I battled with anxiety and disappointment, wondering why things had to change again. The move from secondary school to JC was already difficult, and now I may have to change school again. The tears couldn’t stop coming.

If there’s anyone who understands the challenges of transition, it’s Joseph. He went through many rough transitions as a young person. His whole world changed when his brothers ganged up on him and sold him into slavery. He was trafficked to Egypt, sold to one of Pharaoh’s officials, and later thrown into prison for a crime he didn’t commit. Even though these unexpected and painful transitions happened, Joseph didn’t lose faith but had the confidence to face them because God was with him through it all. Genesis 39:23 tells us that “the LORD was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did.”

This phrasing is also found in an earlier verse — Genesis 39:3. This repeated emphasis on God’s presence highlights the fact that Joseph was never alone to deal with the difficult transitions. In fact, wherever Joseph went, people recognised that God was with him and that God’s favour was on him. That was why Joseph was in charge of overseeing his master’s household and the prisoners even though he was a foreigner. Although things changed, God remained, taking care of Joseph and blessing him with His presence.

If I could turn back time, I’d tell my 17-year-old self not to be afraid of a new season because God’s presence is always with me. No matter which school I go to, whoever my friends are, and whichever course I study, I can be confident that God remains and He is with me through unexpected changes.

I eventually stayed in my dream school, got posted to a new class in the Arts stream, and grew to love studying Literature. It was God’s faithful presence that helped me through those times of change.

No matter what transitions we go through, let’s find the courage to journey through them, not because of our own wisdom and abilities, but because God is with us.

PRAYER
Lord, thank You for being here with me, even through difficult transitions. Cast out the fears within me, and grant me courage to face the changes, knowing that You will work all things out according to Your perfect ways. Amen.

REFLECTION TIME
1. What’s one thing you can do to draw closer to God’s presence in the midst of life’s changes?
2. Do you know of someone who is struggling through change? Reach out to that person to show that you care!

DELVE DEEPER
Read and reflect on these passages for more about God’s faithfulness amidst life’s changes:
o Genesis 37, 39
o Deuteronomy 31:7-8
o Psalm 102:25-28

HANDLES
Keep a journal for your Bible reading and create your own prompts to note down what you’ve learnt!
o Some new insights I had were …
o My favourite verse this week is …
o God is guiding me to change …
o I’m excited for God to …