Issue 25 – Kallos

Out Of The Harbor

Jiamin Choo — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

“Jiamin, what will you do in the future?” many asked during my third year in university. Should I enter the corporate world like most of my peers? Pursue further studies? Or respond to the growing desire in my heart — to offer God my first fruits after graduation by serving as a missionary onboard OM’s ship Doulos in obedience to God’s call on my life? I had never felt so torn and afraid.

Singapore had been like a harbour — a place of refuge, comfort, and security. I was on the route to obtaining a degree that would open doors to a well-paying job to provide for my widowed mum and younger siblings.

Standing at life’s crossroad, there was nothing I wanted more than to serve God in missions. However, the cost was high. If I were to obey the Heavenly Captain’s call, it would mean sailing away from these safe shores, leaving my loved ones behind, and having an uncertain future.

My biggest fear was what others would think of me. Some said, “You’re the eldest child. If you go on the Doulos, what’ll happen to your ageing mother? You’re supposed to take care of the family.” Some thought I was brave to go alone. Others were concerned I wouldn’t be receiving a salary and advised me to work for a few years before joining Doulos. There were nights when I cried silently, wrestling with God about the fear of being misunderstood as an unfilial daughter.

In such a time, I was reminded of how Peter walked on water toward Jesus (Matt 14:22–33). In the midst of winds and waves, when Peter saw Jesus walking on water toward the disciples’ boat, he dared to ask, “Lord, if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water (v. 28).” At Jesus’ command, “Come,” Peter obediently climbed out of the boat, felt the cold waves under his feet, and walked toward Jesus in faith (v. 29).

Peter’s eyes were fixed on Jesus who called him. He was the One whom Peter witnessed the previous day feeding over 5,000 people with five loaves and two fishes (Matt 14:13–21). This was the same Jesus who healed his mother-in-law by ordering the fever to leave her (Matt 8:14–15). Surely Jesus can keep Peter walking on water.

Things were going well until reality hit. The gusty wind got the experienced fisherman’s attention and steered his focus off Jesus. Fear overtook faith, and Peter started sinking. But as he cried for help, Jesus immediately reached out and caught Peter. When they got into the boat safely, the wind died down.

Like Peter who got out of his boat at the call of Jesus, I was stepping out of my comfort zone to obey God’s missions call. Like Peter whose faith was shaken by the wind, I had taken my eyes off God and allowed the fear of what others were thinking to overwhelm me. But how comforting to know that despite my little faith, God’s merciful and powerful presence gives courage.

I recalled how God had taken care of my family by providing loved ones to help with finances after my father passed away. I remembered how my identity is anchored in Christ, and not in what others say about me. Surely God can enable me to serve Him in missions, and also watch over my family, friendships, and future.

In faith, I surrendered my fears to the Heavenly Captain who had called me, and followed Him out of the harbour and onboard the Doulos. I sailed for four years to 31 countries, bringing a message of hope in Christ, and learning to love the world beyond my shore, one port at a time. If I could live my life all over again, would I still have chosen this path? Yes, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Because there is no greater joy than obeying my God, being where He calls me to be, doing what He calls me to do.

“A ship is safe in harbour, but that’s not what ships are for.” — William Shedd

REFLECTION TIME
1. What are some fears that you wrestle with? How do you usually deal with fear?
2. Are you willing to surrender your fears to God, trusting Him to take care of you and the things/people you care about? Why, or why not?

DELVE DEEPER
Read and reflect on these passages about courage:
o Esther 4
o Psalm 27
o Acts 4:1–31

HANDLES
Try reading the Bible in different translations for a richer understanding of God’s Word! While the word-for-word translations emphasise the original text’s literal wording (e.g. ESV, NASB, etc.), the thought-for-thought translations aim to keep the original text’s in-tended meaning (e.g. NIV NLT, etc.).

Foreign Domestic Workers In Singapore

Isabel Phua — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

STATISTICS

243,000 FDWs IN Singapore IN 2017 (MOM, 2017)

12 HOURS OF WORK A DAY (TWC2, 2016)

40% COMPLAIN OF NO REST DAY (HOME, 2016)

Read Dewi's Story

Dewi had never left home before. She didn’t even have a passport until a friend recommended that she try working in Singapore to earn money and support her family. In order to get into the country, she has to be trained, get a passport, and pay for her transport costs — all of which she has no money for. So she borrows some money in hopes that she will be able to pay it back soon. Over her two-year contract, she had only 12 rest days — one every two months. 717 out of 730 days of non-stop working, nearly 14 hours of work per day. X was not even given the freedom to cook or eat her own food. Instead, she had to wait for her employers to finish their meal, only receiving the unwanted leftovers every day. After two years of suffering these quiet indignities, she was ready to go home… but doing so might mean having to pay yet another agent’s fee, so she decided to stay for yet another two years…

Unfortunately, Dewi’s story is not unique, and of the 243,000 FDWs in Singapore, a number of them will experience something similar.

Why do they come to Singapore?

Just like any of us, most FDWs are trying to support their families. They come in order to provide education for their children, pay medical bills for sick family members, buy land to build a home, or simply to earn enough to pay their bills. Because of the difference in economic development, the salaries in Singapore are definitely much higher than what they receive back home. Some FDWs, especially those from the Philippines, even have university degrees, yet earn more working as a maid in Singapore than in a corporate job back home!

How are they treated?

While most FDWs enjoy good employers and a safe working environment, this is not true for some. Although cases of maid abuse is usually most widely reported in the media, physical abuse and violence is not the most prevalent form of mistreatment. In fact, only 26 cases were reported in 2014. However, FDWs experience quiet indignities every single day. Some FDWs do not get a weekly rest day even though it is part of the labour law in Singapore, and others shared that they experience limited access to communication with other people, are locked up with the homes with security cameras watching their every move, are not allowed to go outside, and are given a heavy workload with no rest. In addition, FDWs can be see as “less than” a regular person, and are constantly verbally abused or scolded over minor mistakes.

What happens to them?

For FDWs who experience mistreatment, these abuses are merely something to be tolerated and endured as they feel helpless or afraid to report their employers. In physical abuse cases, some may not even report it to the police as they may have had bad experiences with the authorities in their home countries and thus, do not trust that they will be treated fairly. Others are not even aware of the helplines they can call. In most cases, quiet indignities remain a perpetual issue, and go unreported until they escalate into physical abuse.

PRAY FOR:
– Good Christian employers who protect FDWs and treat them with dignity (Lev 19:33)
– Local churches to invest resources in reaching out to FDWs and providing them a safe and loving environment in the church
– God’s protection over FDWs who face difficult employers and work situations
– God to raise up more God-fearing employment agencies who will take care of the FDW’s welfare

What Clubbing Taught Me About Purity

Isabel Phua — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

I love clubbing! As a person who loves music and dancing, you can literally find me grooving everywhere — when I’m driving, in the shower, or even grocery shopping; I’m ready to bust out my moves! That’s why I find clubbing so much fun — especially the euphoric moment when the DJ puts on a crowd favourite and EVERYONE sings and dances in unison!

During my polytechnic days, my schoolmates would ask me to go clubbing with them. I was afraid to join them because I was advised against it by my church leaders, who told us that clubbing was not godly. While I was afraid, I was also curious. Thus, in my final year of poly, I decided to visit Zouk for the first time. I made sure I went when I did not have school the next day, in anticipation of a late night out. I also made sure I went with friends who had similar values with me, so that the chances of getting pressured into doing things I didn’t want to do would be slim.

So when I finally went to the club, I found it enjoyable and understood why people loved to go there! But as much as I found pleasure in this, I felt God speaking to me each time I went to a club over the years, and that has changed my perspective entirely. Here are two aspects of this “grey area” that showed me that if I wanted to pursue purity, I would have to give it up.

#1 DRUNKENNESS IS COMMON

One time when I was clubbing with a Christian friend, she could not resist the pressure from her school friends and downed many drinks with hard liquor. She ended up getting drunk, laughing hysterically at everything, taking a puff from her friend’s cigarette, and started going to her guy friends to give them each a hug. I tried to tell her to control herself, but she could not.

Another time, I got tipsy when I was at a bar with my friends and was pressured to get another drink. When I was in a taxi getting home — and I thought this only happened in movies — my head started pounding as the lights coming from the streetlamps were magnified and the whole world felt like it was swirling! I staggered home, sat in the shower, and started drinking from the water hose. #unglam

THE CLUBBING SCENE IS ALSO A PLACE FULL OF SENSUALITY

These minor experiences cannot be compared to instances where people do far worse things that they regret, or when girls get raped or molested when others lose control of their senses. Yet these moments allowed me to see how one can easily lose control under the influence of alcohol that is readily available in clubs.

Ephesians 5:15–18 says, “Be very careful, then, how you live — not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit”. Being in a state of drunkenness where there is a loss of control absolutely contrasts with Galatians 5:23, where it is stated that being filled with the Spirit means gaining self-control. Of course, not everyone who goes clubbing will get drunk. But we cannot deny that especially for those who love to drink, or even for those who easily succumb to peer pressure, the temptations are very strong.

#2 IT IS A PLACE OF SENSUALITY

The clubbing scene is also a place full of sensuality — meaning the enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of physical, especially sexual, pleasure. Some of my male friends have even shared that it is a place where they go to “pick up” girls or even have a dance fling where they get to touch girls. There was one time in Zouk when I saw a couple on the dance floor making out and touching each other, and though I was not involved in the act, it was enough to arouse lustful desires in me.

But sensuality is also not just limited to what we see. It is also expressed in our minds as we listen to the music in clubs. Google the lyrics to Ellie Goulding’s Love Me Like You Do and The Chainsmokers’ Closer and you will see why. We know the impact music has on people, be it emotional or psychological. Some of us even remember song lyrics better than Bible verses! That is the power of music. It has the ability to stick in our minds and to turn lies into truths. This is an aspect of clubbing that we can never control, unless you are the DJ of course.

NOT THAT INNOCENT

When I went clubbing, I was told, “Empty your mind,” and “Let the music control your body”. It was very easy to groove to whatever song that was playing, even if it was a song that was full of vulgarities or described sex explicitly — as long as the right beats were there, my body went along with it.

As I allowed the music to fill my mind and dance to the songs, I felt God asking me, “Why are you emptying your mind for a worldly and temporal satisfaction? And why are you using your body — the temple of God — to worship me in the church dance ministry, yet also treat it so loosely here? In that moment, Romans 12:1–2 came alive to me: “… offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God — this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world…” This moment changed my perception of clubbing, which until then simply seemed like harmless fun.

I don’t think that it is inherently wrong to be in clubs, but is it the wisest decision? For me, it wasn’t (and still isn’t), because I cannot guarantee that I will not stumble, and the Bible makes it very clear what we should do in the face of temptations … flee (Jas 4:7)!

THIS MOMENT CHANGED MY PERCEPTION OF CLUBBING, WHICH UNTIL THEN SIMPLY SEEMED LIKE HARMLESS FUN

SO... SHOULD A CHRISTIAN GO CLUBBING?

Even though I enjoyed the experience of clubbing, I remember disturbing scenes too: someone passed out from too much alcohol, a girl slapping a guy, two girls in a brawl, shouting at each other … As I witnessed these, I felt God saying, “These people are broken and the only reason why a Christian should be here, is if you are reaching out to them.”

So, should a Christian go clubbing? I think a better question would be, “Does this make me more like Christ and help me pursue my calling as a Christian? Am I putting off my deceitful desires, getting my mind renewed, putting on my new self that reflects true righteousness and holiness (Eph 4:23–24)?”

Based on my past experiences, I can only say, nah. If I want to pursue purity and holiness, I must give this up. Yet, I know that I’ve found a greater satisfaction as I walk in accordance to the ways of God. Jesus promises in Matthew 5:8, “Blessed are the pure in the heart, for they will see God”. For me, this can never be compared to the fleeting, worldly pleasures that clubbing offers.

Spotlight: Hazel Kweh Founder Of Bloomback

Quek Shiwei — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

A former air stewardess and financial planner, Hazel was the last person to think that she would one day run a social enterprise. Hazel is the founder of Bloomback, a company aiming to advocate a floral movement that benefits underprivileged communities, with a special focus on marginalised women, by helping them achieve financial independence and dignity. Here is her story!

First of all, what does Bloomback mean?

I think the name speaks for itself! ‘Bloom’ represents flowers — we use flowers to help marginalised or underprivileged women gain back their lost confidence and their dignity, encouraging them to keep blooming. And ‘back’ is to let them know we have their back, our way of giving back to the community in that sense.

How did the idea for Bloomback first begin?

It came about as a passion project. My sister was experiencing depression, and she had difficulty finding a job due to her visual and hearing impairment. I was attending a friend’s wedding, and she asked me to bring her flowers home and share the joy with other people because she knew that I loved flowers. And I thought, “Rather than just bring it home, why not repurpose it and bring it to hospitals with my sister?” I thought it might help my sister to do that. But it was too last minute, so when we approached hospitals, they were not able to take them.

So instead, we distributed the flowers to the lower- income residents at Beach Road. We just went door- to-door and gave them flowers! That’s how it started. For my sister, it was impactful for her to see the less- fortunate in Singapore, and she told me, “When there are such things, can you involve me again?”

It was a one-off event, but after that, the hospitals got back to us and said that this was a meaningful movement that we could do more frequently. So yeah, we did this a couple of times, and as a result also received good feedback from florists who wanted to see the flowers they used for events and weddings have a second life to bless others.

Bloomback is now a social enterprise that does more than just repurpose flowers. How did the original idea evolve into the final product?

While working with florists, I found that they also have challenges in their daily job. For example, they have difficulties finding customers, and the online market is pushing brick-and-mortar stores out of business. I realised that actually, we are in this together as a community, we are like-minded, and I want to help all these big-hearted florists, so why not create a system to help these florist, and at the same time, share this movement with more people?

I got to know more about social enterprises, how they function, and what I have to do in order to keep this movement running and sustainable. We decided to create a marketing platform for these florists to promote their businesses, and at the same time, a portion of the proceeds from sales can be donated to help this movement to repurpose flowers. That’s how we began!

What difficulties have you faced in the process?

Most people think that flowers are a good-to-have, not a must-have. Flowers are deemed luxury products that just die quickly. It’s been difficult to educate people that flowers are not just luxury gifts, but can be very meaningful. For example, according to Harvard research, patients who have plants and flowers in their room recover 30% faster than those without. Specific to Bloomback, we want people to know that when you buy flowers to cheer people up, the cycle doesn’t just stop there — you’re actually helping women in need as well, and the cycle of giving back actually goes on.

WHEN YOU BUY FLOWERS TO CHEER PEOPLE UP... YOU'RE ACTUALLY HELPING WOMEN IN NEED

How has your life’s journey affected your current career?

I was actually born in a low-income, single-parent family, so all along I was the only one supporting the family even though I’m the youngest. I had to be the pillar of the family, so prior to knowing Jesus, I was always out, trying to earn money to get out of the cycle of poverty. There was a lot of bitterness against my family, to the extent that I even moved out to live on my own. I thought that would bring me peace, but it actually made me lonelier than ever.

I couldn’t deal with the loneliness, and I had no one I could turn to. That’s when I just cried out to God one day and said, “If You’re really there, then just make me feel peaceful.” And after praying, really, I felt the peace. That was the first time in my life that I just sat there, very still, and I finished reading a whole book that a Christian friend passed to me a week before. I think in a way, my friend was God’s way of reaching out to me. The book, Purpose Driven Life was what convinced me to become a Christian.

So now, in a social enterprise that will not earn me much, I’ve had to adjust my expectations. My career was at its peak, everything seemed good, but inside of me, I did not feel complete. I was lonely and I didn’t have love for my family. It was really just by accepting Christ that my family ties were restored and my priorities in life adjusted. God reminds me that “Hey, since you already embarked on the journey, where money doesn’t complete you, so here’s what you can do — try my path, I’ll walk you through it.”

Is this experience with your family where your passion comes from?

It is definitely the main driving force, because I understand how marginalised women feel. I mean, I’m not like my sister, I wasn’t born with disabilities and I’m quite fortunate, but having been in the family situation as a whole, I felt that I was marginalised in a way because I had to go through what they’re going through and I didn’t have any help. I want to do something to help other women as well, and it’s only through my personal experiences that I can convince other people that even though I am not in your shoes, I know how you feel, but I’m dealing okay, and it’s not the end of the world. And coupled with having Jesus, you know, that gave me the extra push, to know that I’m not alone— I have Jesus in the midst of my work, my family, and He’s helping to restore everything in my life.

Finally, what do you want to be most remembered for?

I guess it boils down to my brand’s name — Bloomback. I want people to know that whether they are waiting to bloom, are already blooming, or feel like they have stopped blooming, in their up or down times, they always have something to give back to the community. This is a community of love that motivates one another, using flowers as a vehicle to change lives, and I want to be known for providing the platform for this to happen!

Why Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

Christiana Chan — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

“I wish I was wasn’t born into this family!”

“I wish we were never friends!”

“I wish I could cut off ties with you!”

In the heat of the moment, we often utter the above phrases or simply conjure up the thought when we argue with friends or family (I admit I do it too!). We’re so riled up with anger that we speak whatever is on our mind and whatever helps us to escape from losing the argument. We never apologise either, thinking that time will heal and help us to forget and move on. However, we continue bearing the grudges, the hurt, and the memories of our argument, even years on.

It is in moments like these where SORRY becomes the most powerful word in unleashing forgiveness and maintaining our relationships with people.

It is a simple, five-letter word.

Yet, it is often the hardest word to utter with sincerity. How many times do we say sorry and actually mean it? Do we say sorry for being late to a meeting? Do we say sorry for wrongfully accusing someone? Do we say sorry for words that have hurt people? We rarely do — what more when we think we’re right? However, when we utter this simple word and mean it, we realise that it takes humility to admit we’re wrong, courage to put others first, and maturity to admit responsibility for what we have done!

THE COURAGE TO BE HUMBLED

I’m sure many of us have been hurt by the words and actions of others. Joseph was no different in this respect!

When he was just 17 years old, Joseph’s brothers plotted to kill him (Gen 37:18–20).They stripped him and threw him into a pit where there was no water (Gen 37:23–24). They even lied to Jacob, their father, that Joseph was devoured by an animal, when in fact they had sold him off to Ishmaelites (Gen 37:27–28)!

Chapters later in the book of Genesis, we read about how the guilt of such treachery against Joseph ate at their conscience (Gen 42:21). Their confession of wrongdoing led Joseph to weep (Gen 42:24)!

Will we allow someone to close a chapter of hurt in their lives through our courage to say a simple apology?

Just as how Joseph needed to hear that his brothers were sorry about the wrong they did to him, our friends or family might also need to hear a simple “I’m sorry” to move on from the hurt that we have caused them. By courageously apologising and mending a broken relationship, you could bring healing to both them and yourself today!

THE COURAGE TO PUT OTHERS FIRST

When we apologise, we also put other people’s feelings and emotions above our own. You may feel that you are right, or even that you have nothing to apologise for, but putting others first means that we humble ourselves and say sorry anyway for whatever hurt we may have unknowingly caused. As Philippians 2:3–4 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others”.

I’VE COME TO REALISE THAT SAYING SORRY ISN’T ABOUT ME, ME, AND ME. IT HAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE ABOUT OTHERS

As teenagers, our quick tongue retorts or talks back to whatever our parents say. I talked back to my parents so often as a teen that they thought I would become a lawyer in the future! However, have we thought about the hurt that we might actually be causing them with our supposedly quick-witted words of rebellion? Have we thought about things from the perspectives of our parents? I’ve come to realise that saying sorry isn’t about me, me, and me. It has and always will be about others!

I recently watched a TED talk by Shann Ray Ferch, a writer who focuses on forgiveness studies, about an incident with his wife’s family. Once, his father-in-law made a sharp remark to his wife, which Ferch did not even think was particularly harsh. However, later in the evening, his father-in-law came and apologised to Ferch, which confused him. When Ferch insisted he did not have to apologise for anything, his father-in-law said: “In our family, we ask forgiveness of the person that we harmed, and also everybody else that was there in order to restore the dignity of the one that was harmed.”

Ferch’s story inspires me to not merely apologise for the sake of apologising, but to genuinely apologise for the wrong I have done. Just like Philippians 2:3–4, it inspires me to think of the feelings of the people I’ve hurt and put their feelings above my own selfishness and reluctance to say “I’m sorry”.

THE COURAGE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

Moreover, saying a simple “I’m sorry” signifies that we willingly take a part of the blame.

I clearly remember the days of a breakup, when my boyfriend cheated on me with another girl. It broke my heart and left me in pain, leaving me to grapple with the broken shards. I hated seeing his face, and I hated having to work with him.

The closure of this chapter in my life came with his apology while I was on a mission trip to Thailand. That simple phrase, “I’m sorry”, ministered so deeply to me and helped me to move on. I felt my heart grow lighter as God allowed all the bitterness to wash away I knew it wasn’t easy for him to say it. The amount of guilt that weighed on his heart must have become lighter upon saying those two words and admitting the mistake that he had made. Since then, we’ve chosen forgiveness and put aside our bitterness and resentment and continue to be friends today.

I FELT MY HEART TO GROW LIGHTER AS GOD ALLOWED ALL THE BITTERNESS TO WASH AWAY

When we own up to a mistake and apologise, a great burden is lifted off us, but also from others.

TWO SIMPLE WORDS

It’s never easy to release healing to someone who has hurt you or whom you’ve hurt. But that’s why we also do need an extra ounce of courage from God to step out of our comfort zone to do what is right and needed rather than inhabit our own bubble. Will you willingly take God’s hand to step out and apologise today?

Stop That Train! Putting A Halt To Gossip

Natalie Hanna Tan — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

Scenario 1. “Do you know what happened the other day? Amy came into the meeting room and said that she didn’t like how things have been planned so far for this year’s camp. How obnoxious! Who is she to just barge in here and think she’s the boss when she didn’t even do a good job last year!”

Most of us, if not all, would have found ourselves in such a situation before. Perhaps we were hurt or angered by someone, and we just had to vent it out to a friend. We know there is power in words, and we know that gossiping is wrong. We try our best not to gossip, but we can’t help it at times. It just comes out.

Scenario 2. “Hey, don’t share this with anyone else, but I am so hurt by Jane. I don’t understand how she can treat me like this after everything I’ve done for her this year — I shared my notes with her, blessed her with meals, and even planned a surprise birthday party for her! What kind of friend is she?”

We’ve all been hurt, and more often than not, our first instinct is to share it with someone else — to ask for a third opinion, to gather some sympathy, to release the negative emotions…

Scenario 3. “This just happened today… I heard that Sarah told Jeremy that she likes him, but Jeremy rejected her! I’m so worried for Sarah now. Do you think we need to tell her leaders about it? And Jeremy too! How can he reply her like that! We should ask someone to talk to him right? It’s only for his good that he learns!”

We all get worried about our friends at times. But could we be bringing them down unintentionally as we try to show our concern by talking about them behind their backs?

THE FINE LINE

If we don’t necessarily find ourselves in the first scenario, perhaps Scenarios 2 and 3 might hit home for many of us. While they don’t seem like gossip per se, it is often easy to cross the lines of “authenticity” and “concern” and end up in idle gossip. These three scenarios are actually not much different from each other. While our sharing may come from various intentions (some more “wrong” than others), the effect is the same.

This line is exceptionally easy to cross within the church setting. Whether we’re doing it intentionally or not, it’s easy to hide behind the guise of care or concern, or vulnerable sharing, while actually spreading false reports about someone or a situation. Exodus 23:1 commands, “Do not spread false reports. Do not help a guilty person by being a malicious witness.” While this verse is aimed at individuals who are in court, it can perhaps be applied to those who are in personal conflict as well.

While we may be wronged by a friend or family member and desire to explain the truth to others, how we phrase our words may easily exaggerate the situation or spread a false and subjective view of what actually happened. Just by doing so, we are not honouring the person the way we should. Does that mean that we cannot share anything with anyone anymore? Of course not! There is still space to vulnerably share your problems with people you trust. However, there are ways to ensure our conscience is clear and that we are honouring God and one another. Here are three things to consider before you become a gossip-monger:

Search Your Heart

Before you say something about someone else, search your heart and ask: What is your motive is behind it? Does it honour the other person or does it tear him or her down? Asking these questions allows us to pause before we cross the fine line into gossip. The Bible is clear: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (Eph 4:29). Because words have power, they need to be used to edify and not to tear down. Instead of dropping juicy bits of gossip under the guise of “authentic sharing”, think about how you can honour the person you are speaking about with your words. In some cases, that may be not saying anything at all!

Have Courageous (But Hard) Conversations

When was the last time you found yourself caught in the middle of a he-said-she-said conflict with no resolution? Let’s face it: it’s natural for us to pass on what we hear instead of going up to the person directly to verify if the information is true. Besides, wouldn’t it be super awkward if we have to disclose where we got the information from?

However, think about it this way — if someone were spreading false rumours or half-truths about you, wouldn’t you want your friends to speak to you directly to find out the truth? While it’s normal for us to want the easy way out, the most Christlike thing to do is to speak authentically and directly to the person involved. In Matthew 18:15, Jesus even says that when someone has sinned, we are to speak to the person “just between the two of you” to point out their fault. If you’ve heard something that causes you concern, try going to the person directly instead of passing information down the gossip train while the person in question remains in the dark.

When In Doubt, Don't

“Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.” (Prov 10:19)

“Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies.” (Psa 34:13)

“Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down.” (Prov 26:20)

The Bible writes about the power of our words more times than I can count, and the message is obvious: When in doubt, don’t! We show prudence and wisdom when we keep gossip to ourselves and be a “dead end” where gossip stops. Enough said (pun intended!).

DO YOU BRING LIFE?

We know the verse well: “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (Prov 18:21). Do we want to bring life or death whenever we speak? Do we want to tear down or build up? Pieces of gossip are everywhere, but we can choose what to do when we receive it. May Psalm 141:3 be our prayer as we consider the power of our words: “Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips”.

Dear Kallos: How Do I Deal With Anxiety?

Alina Teo — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

“I am waiting for my O/A-level results and I have serious anxiety about it. I have nightmares all the time and am filled with so much fear. How should I face this?” – Fearful

dear Fearful,

God cares deeply about you and He is with you every step of the journey. Rest assured that what matters to you, matters to Him too.

In a city like Singapore where academics are very important, our grades often define who we are in the eyes of others, such that we often lose ourselves in the chase. But remember this: Your worth is far more than your grades.

While I was studying for my A-levels, I was in a similar position as you. I clearly remember studying with a great dread in my heart because I was so afraid to “mess up”. However, a friend who knew the deep fear I had sat me down and laid out the big picture for me. That friend reminded me that God loves me, He is for me and I can trust Him no matter the outcome. Sitting for the A-levels was just a small part in the grand scheme of things and if I chose to surrender to God and simply gave the best that I had, then I needn’t worry.

Are you willing to surrender your results and the outcome of the road ahead to God, knowing that He is a good God who is in control? Do you believe that no matter what the outcome may be, you aren’t any lesser as a person?

Jesus tells His disciples in Luke 12: 22–26 to “not be anxious” because we are of great value to God and our worrying does not do any good. Cast your cares upon God (1 Pet 5:7) and ask Him to give you peace. May the nightmares be gone in Jesus’ name! We encourage you to share these struggles with your close friends and leaders, giving them the room to support you on this journey too.

Practically, learn to manage your stress by meeting up with friends and having fun together, be it through exercising or doing other meaningful activities together. Take your mind off the results and relax. For me, writing helps me process my thoughts and gives me an outlet to release my stress. You could try that too.

Don’t let fear grip your life. Let God grant you the peace and show you His purposes as you surrender to Him.

Dig Deeper: Did Jesus Really Exist?

Hannah Leung — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

Have you ever wondered if Jesus Christ was a real human being? I have! Our Christian faith rests on the gospel, which depends on the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ being real events in history. That means that if they did not happen, we would be chasing an empty, self-deceiving religion. However, if Jesus really did live, die, and resurrect, the Christian perspective of what our lives mean is dramatically hopeful and life-changing.

The evidence of history

How do we commonly measure our years? We measure them by the AD and BC system. AD (Anno Domini) means “in the year of the Lord”, while BC stands for “Before Christ”. A monk named Dionysius Exiguus introduced the AD time system at around AD 525. While it is widely recognised that the actual date he references as when Jesus was born is likely to be inaccurate, it reflects the significance of the person of Christ. So, the way that we refer to history is based on Him! Jesus was a defining figure in history that changed the course of humankind. How cool is it that even our time system reflects the life of Jesus?

The evidence of the gospel accounts

Let’s start with the New Testament accounts: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Remember that these are historical documents which focuses on the person of Jesus Christ. It wasn’t one person who wrote all four Gospel books, but four individual men who saw Jesus in the flesh (Matthew and John) or were close to those who did (Mark and Luke). The Gospels complement each other, telling the same events from different perspectives.

Furthermore, non-biblical historical documents confirm the testimonies of these writings. Papias, Bishop of Hierapolis, who lived in the first century, records the spoken words of “the Elder”, who is the apostle John. Irenaeus, a Bishop from the second century, referred to and directly talked about the Gospel records in his writings. The Gospels revolve around narratives of Jesus. Thus, these other-biblical records of the Gospel writings show that they did exist.

Publius Cornelius Tacitus, an ancient historian whose writings are widely accepted as reliable, also confirms the life and death of Jesus in his writings. Another historian Josephus, a Jewish historian in first-century Rome who is recognised as an authoritative voice for the accuracy of his writings, makes two references to Jesus (Christ) in Antiquities of the Jews. He writes about “the brother of Jesus, who was called Christ, whose name was James”. Scholars largely agree that this piece of writing is authentic, and hence it is a piece of evidence for the historical existence of Jesus.

Writing this brought to mind a quote by C.S. Lewis: “The Son of God became a man to enable men to become sons of God.” Our prayer is that in asking these questions, you will not just be equipped to defend your faith, but will gain a deeper conviction about the gospel, and be confident that the ground on which your faith rests is truly unshakeable. In the next issue, we dig deeper into the life of Jesus: Did Jesus Really Die and Resurrect?

Take The Bible Challenge

Quek Shiwei — Sun, 28 Jan 2018 16:00:00 +0000

CHALLENGE RULES

For 3 weeks, memorise a passage in Scripture
At the end of each week, you should be able to write the passage out in full without mistakes!
Journal out your thoughts and what God is speaking to you through His word.

Challengers:
1. CHYNNE ONG, 19
I can snowboard… somewhat decently. Also, my friends say that I have really smooth skin!

2. GABRIELLA TEO, 19
My wardrobe is colour-coded, and fun fact! I took an allergy test when I was younger and the results revealed that I am allergic to cockroaches!

INITIAL THOUGHTS

Gabriella: When I realised that the challenge was on memorising bible CHAPTERS, I was speechless and was not really looking forward for it. My church has memory verses tests and it is already a struggle for me — what more a chapter a week!

Chynne: When I received the challenge I was a little worried that I will not be able to see this challenge through. Memorising these chapters seem like it would take up a lot of my time and this is a period filled with many commitments to juggle.

THE CHALLENGE

Week 1 – Psalm 23
Gabriella: Thankfully, Week 1 was easy because I already knew Psalm 23 by heart. Even now, I still recite and meditate on Psalm 23 throughout the day and ask God to speak to me through His Word. Sure enough, God did speak! Through this Psalm, God renewed my perspective that He is the giver of strength and peace and I can find rest in Him. The days that followed were different because I remembered the promise of His words and I no longer carried the same burdened and heavy heart, but one of joy

Chynne: When I saw the reading for week 1, I was relieved because the length looked manageable. I decided to split it up and memorise about 2 to 3 Lines before I go to bed every night. As I kept re-reading the chapter, the words got easier to digest. Surprisingly it didn’t take as long as I thought!

The verses “He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul” were incredibly reassuring, and brought about waves of calmness whenever I felt the stress getting to me. So far so good for Week 1! I Hope I can say the same after Week 2.

Week 2 – Proverbs 4
Gabriella: When I saw that this week’s reading was on Proverbs, I knew that it was going to be a challenge. I decided to try to utilise my daily commute and lunch break time to memorise at least 4 verses a day. As I was so pre-occupied with work, I am sad to say that I only got as far as half of the passage.

Despite it being a hectic week, I tried to meditate on what it meant attain wisdom (the focal point of Proverbs 4). There were many points this week where I felt like giving up, but the song God I Look To You by Bethel kept ringing in my ear. The lyrics “God I look to you, I won’t be overwhelmed / You’re where my help comes from” and “Give me wisdom, you know just what to do” stuck with me. I felt like God revealed Himself through the Word, that I should ask Him for wisdom like how a child would and to have the faith that He will bring me through my circumstances.

Chynne: My first thought after seeing the length of the passage was that I would not be able to complete the challenge.

When I first read the passage, I didn’t think much about it. However, whilst doing my daily devotional a few days later, God spoke to me. The devotional shared a story of a family that was lost; the father finally decided to get directions from someone to get to their destination. Despite receiving directions, the father ignored them and continued going about his own way — how silly! Likewise, God has given us directions or instructions through the Word but yet we choose to do things otherwise at times. I found this chapter really interesting because it was essentially a list of instructions to guide us through life!

End of week 2: I was rather disappointed because I only managed to memorise half of the passage.

Week 3 – James 1
Gabriella: James is actually one of my favourite books; I was quite keen on memorising it! But because I’m both a visual and audio learner, I play the online audio bible every once in a while. And similar to learning the lyrics of a song because you play It repeatedly, this method really helped me to memorise the Word better!

Chynne: Similar to the previous week, I only managed to memorise about less than half of the entire passage. I think it was really a result of poor time management and I am guilty of prioritising my time for school work and activities over reading His word.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Gabriella: After these 3 weeks, my perspective of the word has changed! Meditating on a verse/verses for a consecutive number of days helped me to dig deeper in the Word. Also, I realised that in doing so, I tended to carry out the Word in my actions — not intentionally, but it became a natural thing!

Chynne: At the end of the challenge, I began to see reading the Bible in a different light. Previously, I would read the Bible for the sake of it when time permits. But the past three weeks of reading the Bible more intentionally and consistently have compelled me to delve deeper in His word!