Issue 53 – Kallos

Janelle Yeo: I’m a pastor but I doubted if God was real

Quek Shi Yun — Wed, 31 Aug 2022 16:31:00 +0000

Who says pastors have it all figured out? QUEK SHI YUN sits down with Janelle, who shares her honest story of doubting God and growing her faith.

If I asked you to guess what a person might have done before becoming a pastor, I assure you, you wouldn’t even begin to guess anything on Janelle’s list. “I had a friend who was a model, and so she roped me into that. And I acted in Mediacorp, just small roles you know? I’ve been a waitress, I worked in retail… Oh! I even did Uber for a few months just so I could have a car!” Janelle’s energy was contagious, and I found that I couldn’t stop smiling while listening to her.

This was not at all what I expected when I simply asked Janelle what led to her becoming a pastor!

MY BIGGEST CHALLENGE GROWING UP WAS WONDERING IF GOD WAS REAL.

“I never set out to be a pastor,” was her immediate reply. While Janelle was raised in a Christian home, she did not really understand her faith. “I went to church out of habit. I served in ministry, I was in Christian Fellowship… but I didn’t really know if God was there. I even asked myself, what if Buddhism is what’s real? How would I know? I was born into this faith! My biggest challenge growing up was wondering if God was real.”

While her faith was growing, Janelle struggled at home and battled insecurities. Her parents’ rocky marriage was headed toward a divorce, and she questioned God’s goodness. However, a personal encounter with God when she was 18 years old kickstarted her journey of faith. During this time, she had moved to a different church where her cousins were at. It was there when she had the first sense that God was calling her to serve Him in a greater capacity during a service that year.

“I still remember being in the auditorium with about 1,000 people, and I felt a call to serve God and give Him the best years of my life. As the worship came to a close, the Senior Pastor came up on stage and said he felt led to pray for some people. He asked, ‘Is Janelle in church?’ I sensed in my heart that that was me. And as far as I knew, I was the only Janelle in church.”

The pastor prophesied that as people followed Janelle, they would turn towards God and follow Him. After the service, her leaders asked her how she thought that would play out. “I said I don’t know, maybe I’ll just be more involved in church. I brought more friends to church, but nothing really happened after that.”

RUNNING FROM GOD’S CALL

Janelle later felt led to return to her home church after five years and carried on serving God through her university days and early career. She eventually started her own company, and it was a success. She was riding the beginning of the #girlboss wave and enjoyed the hustle and glamour of being an entrepreneur.

So when God pressed in her heart the thought that He wanted her to serve Him in full-time ministry one day, she said no. She laughed as she remembered her response. “I just said, ‘Nope, I don’t want to!’” To compensate for her guilt in rejecting God’s call, she resolved to do more in church. By the end of the year, she was serving in five different ministries in church!

By 2018, she felt like she was in the prime of her life. She had just gotten the keys to her house and business was growing steadily. Her husband, Andrew, had just gotten a promotion, and a baby was on the way. “Everything was so so good, and we were so thankful for everything.”

But things suddenly took a turn in the middle of the year. At the end of June, they found out that their nine-week-old baby had no heartbeat. Andrew’s new job scope turned out to be different from what he expected. And shortly after, they lost their grandmothers in October and November.

“Before I could recover from one death, the next death happened, and then the next. We just couldn’t understand why this was happening.”

I ASKED GOD, WHY ME? … ARE YOU PUNISHING ME?

“I asked God, ‘Why me? You know we love children. You know we love our grandmothers. Why is everything happening at once? I have served you so faithfully and given you my entire youth. Why me? Am I being punished?’”

“That was the first time that my faith was shaken and I really wrestled with God. I couldn’t see how God was good.”

CHOOSING TO OBEY

Amidst her pain, she felt God urging her to go to seminary and really get to know Him for herself. By then, through a series of events and Scripture, she could no longer deny the call to change course and serve Him in full-time ministry.

“I did not want to give up the image I had built for myself — the glamour of going for events, the identity I had as an entrepreneur, and making a name for myself. But God showed me that this wasn’t what He wanted for me. There was something better if I chose to obey.”

During her time in seminary, God showed her why He allowed those things to happen to her and how He was still in control through it all. The week she found out she was pregnant, she was offered a shot at a supporting role in a long-term drama but had to turn it down due to the pregnancy. In hindsight, she recognised it as God’s protection, as He knew that the temptations of the entertainment industry would be too much for her to bear.

He also showed her how the business had puffed up her pride and it was a pride that God had to break down. “Without realising it, I was chasing after my own glory, not God’s.”

God used that season of mourning to show her an important aspect of His character — the depth of His love. Though she initially questioned if God was punishing her, she later came to a different conclusion.

“God allowed these things to happen, but He didn’t cause it. The fact is that we live in a fallen world and suffering does happen. But God can use our sufferings to draw us closer to Him. Instead of punishing me, God was protecting me the whole time. In His grace, He allowed all that to happen so that I could return to Him. He cares more about our holiness than our happiness because He seriously loves us so much. While I couldn’t see His fingerprints in the midst of mourning, God showed me that He was there all along, grieving with me. He didn’t abandon me.”

“Whatever He allows in this fallen world is not the end. This is not our home — the pains and sufferings remind us of that. We have a greater home in heaven.”

Janelle is now in her final semester of seminary, and has started work full-time as a Ministry Staff Worker, pastoring the youths — something she never expected although she now acknowledges that she sees how God had been preparing her for it all these years.

A LESSON IN FAITH

At the end of 2019, she was reading Hebrews 11, or the “Hall of Faith” as she calls it, and it spoke to her to have faith in God and rest in His faithfulness. She sensed God’s deep assurance that a child would come, and to trust in Him and wait on His timing. Then on April Fools’ Day 2021, she found out she was pregnant again. “God is very humorous!” Her son, Callen, was born later that year in November.

Her winding journey of faith has led her to where she is now. But while she sees how God has been with her each step of the way, her journey isn’t over. She makes sure to point out that even pastors have their own struggles and that having faith in God in every circumstance will be a lifelong journey as we submit ourselves to His moulding to become true disciples of Christ.

Her final encouragement is this: Keep seeking God, keep chasing after Him, and let Him lead you.

“What Jesus says in Matthew 11:30 is true. His yoke is easy, His burden is light. We don’t realise it, but it does get easier when we surrender and let God lead our life. Just trust and obey.”

Friendship in Unchartered Waters

Kallos Team — Wed, 31 Aug 2022 16:23:00 +0000

When storms come, what does it take to keep a ‘friend-ship’ afloat? BERNICE TIAN shares how she navigated her friendships through jealousy, swift judgements of friends, and mismatched expectations.

I have a habit of looking at my past photos and old diary entries once in a while. Entries where I talk about spending time at my grandparents’ house feel nostalgic, while rants about my annoying siblings are quite funny to remember! Recently, I found a single entry that stood out from the rest, recalling how lonely and sad I felt because I didn’t have any close friends. I thank God that I no longer feel that way, as He has provided good friends to me since then. What I had not anticipated though, was that with close friendships, conflicts would be inevitable. I have come across countless challenges in my friendships that threatened to break them as quickly as they were first formed. Thankfully, I have been able to pick up a few learning points along the way, and I continue to apply them to my current friendships.

WRANGLING JEALOUSY, THE SEA MONSTER

According to 1 Corinthians 13:4, love “does not envy.” But what happens when jealousy is found within friendships? I had never realised the significance of keeping jealousy at bay until I saw how much it could hurt other people.

I have two best friends (let’s call them Audrey and Sarah), and we are like the three musketeers in church. During youth services, you wouldn’t find one of us without the other two being close by. In fact, at the start of our friendship, I had to get used to the idea of a trio being best friends, as I had thought that you could have only one best friend. The adjective itself is exclusive! Since I had known Audrey longer than Sarah, I was more protective about keeping Audrey to myself. However, Audrey and Sarah were from the same school, so feelings of jealousy arose sometimes when they talked about things that happened that I couldn’t relate to.

Hence, there were times when I preferred to privately text Audrey and leave Sarah out of our chats as I was more comfortable with just Audrey. One day, Sarah found out that Audrey and I had met up a few times by ourselves and expressed her great disappointment about it.

IN MY ATTEMPT TO PROTECT ONE FRIENDSHIP, I HAD HURT THE FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN THE THREE OF US.

She texted us in our group chat, saying, “I feel really left out.” When I saw that she felt hurt and uncomfortable, I knew then that it was selfish of me to try to keep Audrey to myself, making Sarah feel lonely too. In my attempt to protect one friendship, I had hurt the friendship between the three of us.

Jealousy caused me to act selfishly, inflicting the same hurt and insecurities on Sarah that I had experienced myself. That event led us to all communicate with each other more honestly. Now, we know to nip jealousy in the bud instead of allowing it to fester, so that we can treasure and love one another better.

FACING THE STORMS OF JUDGEMENT

Have you heard of Job’s infamous story of loss? Job had devastatingly lost all his family members, his possessions, and his health in a swift span of time. When Job’s friends, Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar came to visit him to comfort him, they ended up bringing more hurt than comfort and were told they were “miserable comforters” (Job 2:11; 16:2). Have you ever done the same thing as Job’s friends by being too quick to judge and assume (e.g., Job 4; 8; 11)? There was a time when I was just like Job’s friends, and nearly caused one of my ‘friend-ships’ to sink.

In 2019, a friend came to me for support and guidance when she had a disagreement with a mutual friend. Caught in the middle of their conflict, I wasn’t sure what to do. Instead of offering a listening ear, I acted as a judge, deciding that my friend was in the wrong. I was quick to criticise rather than to listen. After that, that my friend distanced herself from me for a few months, giving me the cold shoulder. It was obvious that I had lost her trust.

I finally found the courage to apologise some time later. I sent her a voice message, telling her that I was sorry for not only being judgemental, but also for being absent when she needed my support. It comforted me when she responded, expressing her desire to mend our friendship as well.

INSTEAD OF OFFERING A LISTENING EAR, I ACTED AS A JUDGE.

This incident made me realise the fragile nature of friendship. There was a price to pay in the carelessness of the words I uttered and the actions I displayed. Going forward, I’ve taken to heart the exhortation in 1 Thessalonians 5:11 to “encourage one another and build each other up”!

BALANCING EXPECTATIONS

I used to think that some friendships would last forever, but I’ve quickly grown to realise that this isn’t the case. When friends I used to be close to made new friends, that changed the dynamic of our friendship! Though I understood that it was normal for my friends to have other friends, there was a time when I often felt rather disappointed as I scrolled through their Insta Stories. Despite hearing from them that they were too busy to meet with me, they had time to socialise with other people. Despite the closeness we had enjoyed in the past, these friends now looked happier bonding with other people. I was disappointed indeed.

Once, something significant happened to one of my friends, but I only found out after she had posted about it on Instagram. Alas, when I asked if she was feeling okay, she said she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I had expectations of certain friends that we would be close friends till the end, and that we would tell each other our joys and woes. Yet in this case I felt like I was pushed down my friend’s priority list, making me feel hurt and alone.

even in my most difficult times, the only constant friend I could depend on the most was God.

A counsellor once shared with me about the ‘Circles of Friendship,’ an exercise which involves drawing a series of concentric circles, putting your closest friends in the innermost circle, and placing the people you are least close to in the outermost circle. We need to recognise that friends may shift between circles in different seasons, and that’s OK! Identifying the people in my current inner circle as the ones that I can trust and go to in times of need has helped me to manage expectations with my friends and prevent disappointment.

Importantly, when I tried that exercise, I realised that even in my most difficult times, the only constant friend I could depend on the most was God. Sure, there are still times when I feel disappointed when friends I feel close to do not regard me in the same light. Yet as I depend on God who is my good Father, I need not feel like I am less valuable or loved because of it. As I can love others from this place of security, I get to maintain healthy friendships with my friends and let go of the jealousy and discouragement that may come with mismatched expectations.

At the end of the day, God’s consistent love for me encourages me to overcome challenges in my friendships and respond well to them. I also believe that as we continue to put God at the centre of our relationships, we are slowly being moulded to become more Christ-like. We can be inspired to cultivate and treasure healthy friendships because of our relationship with God.

Struggles of a second-gen Christian

Quek Shi Yun — Wed, 31 Aug 2022 16:12:00 +0000

As a second generation Christian, QUEK SHI YUN always doubted if she was really saved. She thought she needed a big emotional moment of conversion to be a real Christian, until God changed her heart.

“So, when did you become a Christian?”

It was a simple question, but one I couldn’t quite answer.

“Well, I grew up in a Christian home, and I’ve always been in the church … but I took my faith more seriously when I was a teen, and ….”

I stumbled my way through a response, and felt my face redden in embarrassment.

SEEDS OF INSECURITY

As I grew up, my parents faithfully shared the gospel with me and brought me to church each week. We did daily devotions together and I was taught to pray every day. Our home was filled with Christian books and music, and conversations over the dinner table consisted of talk about Christian values and what Jesus would do. I slowly developed a relationship with God and had some genuine encounters of His love that shaped my life greatly.

But as I got older, I felt my insecurities about my status as a Christian start to grow.

On a mission trip when I was 15, I vividly recall sitting in a hotel room with all the other girls, just talking about our lives. One of the girls sat on the bed hugging a pillow and started pouring her heart out: “I just love Jesus so much! I love Him so much! I just really, really, really love Him!!!” She started giggling like a girl who was truly in love. I sat there baffled. I had never felt such strong emotions about Jesus.

Also, as an avid reader, I read countless biographies of missionaries and giants in the faith who accomplished great things for God. Many gave or risked their lives to share the gospel, or faced severe persecution yet held on firmly to their faith. While I was inspired by their stories, I was also frequently discouraged. All of them had significant moments of revelation with God that led them on the path to doing wonderful things for Him. I didn’t have any such moment. While I felt that I loved God, the fact that my love wasn’t exuberant and overflowing made me feel insecure. And it made me feel like an inferior Christian.

WHILE I FELT THAT I LOVED GOD, THE FACT THAT MY LOVE WASN’T EXUBERANT AND OVERFLOWING MADE ME FEEL INSECURE.

RESENTING MY STORY

All my life, I have been called a “second-generation Christian”, which is a term used to describe a Christian whose parents are Christian. From this point of view, you could say that I have the special privilege of being a fourth-generation (!) Christian, as my great-grandmother was the first in the family to come to faith.

Yet sometimes, that privilege felt like a curse. Since Christianity was all I had known, I couldn’t say that I had ever made the choice to follow Jesus. While my friends from non-believing families had dramatic encounters with God that led them to Christ, I didn’t have such a story. I had no singular moment of conversion. I don’t even remember saying the sinner’s prayer. For some reason, not having that moment tripped me up greatly, and I was convinced that if I hadn’t been born in a Christian family and could hear the amazing story of the gospel for the first time, I would have that big emotional reaction to God’s love that I desired, and I would be a real Christian.

The thing is, even while I was having those thoughts, I was serving in church, sharing the gospel, and had a real conviction that the God of the Bible was real. I did not have doubts about who God says He is, but I constantly battled with this feeling that my faith was weaker than others’ because my journey of faith was so dull!

UNDERSTANDING SALVATION

Then, when I was in university, I met a young lady who had recently become a Christian. The more time I spent with her, the more jealous I became. She had story after story of how God had been so real to her, and when she spoke about His love, she glowed the way that the girl on the mission trip did.

One day, I told her that I was envious of her experience and wished that I was a first-generation Christian like her. With a stunned look on her face, she said, “Shi Yun, I wish I could have been a second-generation Christian.

I HAD NO SINGULAR MOMENT OF CONVERSION. I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER SAYING THE SINNER’S PRAYER.

If I had been raised in God’s ways, I wouldn’t need to have such a dramatic conversion story. I would have just known Him all my life, and I wouldn’t have gone through so much sin in order to know how much I need a Saviour!”

Her words have stuck with me ever since, as I started to see that my Christian heritage was truly a deep blessing. What I had seen as my boring story was actually rooted in so much of God’s grace, in that I could grow up always having known His love. Instead of resenting my ‘inherited’ faith, I could rejoice in my inheritance and thank God that in His kindness, He has let me know the goodness of His Word since I was born.

THE BIBLE SAYS NOTHING ABOUT EMOTION BEING THE PREREQUISITE OF SALVATION, OR A STUNNING CONVERSION BEING NECESSARY TO FOLLOWING CHRIST.

And what does His Word say? It says that if I confess that Jesus is Lord and believe in my heart that He has been raised from the dead, I will be saved (Rom 10:9–10). It says that it is by grace that I have been saved, through faith, and not by my efforts (Eph 2:8–9). The Bible says nothing about emotion being a prerequisite of salvation or about a stunning conversion being necessary to following Christ. It doesn’t say that I need to be on fire for Jesus at every moment to be a true child of God. All it says is that when I repent of my sins and receive Jesus as Lord, I am saved. And so I am.

RESTING IN GOD’S TRUTH

Today, I see clearly that all those years of insecurity and uncertainty over my status as a Christian were unnecessary, and the belief that being a second-generation Christian making me somehow inferior as a follower of Christ was an utter falsehood. I wish I could get back those years of anxiety, envy, and fear, as I questioned if I was truly saved. I now know that all those small moments of learning about Jesus and slowly building my faith were just as legitimate as someone else’s big moment of revelation about the grace of God. While growing up in a Christian home doesn’t necessarily make anyone a Christian, it gave me an incredible foundation of knowledge about God and His love for me. And as that knowledge of His Word has slowly sunk into my heart, it has transformed me.

I no longer look down on my faith journey. It might appear boring — just a steady, faithful plod along the journey of sanctification — but it is no less sacred. If you were to ask me today when I became a Christian, I still wouldn’t have a straightforward answer. But what I would say is this: I know that how and when I was saved is not as important as knowing that I am loved by God and am regarded as His child. Being able to rest securely in that truth has freed me from years of struggling as a second-generation Christian.

Where were You when I needed You, God?

Kallos Team — Mon, 29 Aug 2022 09:32:00 +0000

“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deut 31:8)

“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” (Ps 118:6)

Have you lived through the unthinkable? Had your life knocked off course in a matter of moments, along with what you thought you had faith in God for? An earnest prayer gone seemingly unanswered. Someone you love taken away. Something horrible happening to you. I have felt all these through my 33 years, but the first time my relationship with God was thrown into question took place when I was just nine years old, after I was sexually assaulted by a person I thought I could trust.

The incident kept me in chains way into my teenage years, becoming a raw, angry part of my heart I let no one — not God, not even my conscious self — near. Every time the subject was broached or triggered, the tears came, and so did unbridled rage. It was a mix of everything too painful to dissect, much less think about: Why had I let this happen to myself? How would I ever find full justice? Where was God when I needed Him most?

I didn’t resent this God I had come to know and love on other fronts of my life, but neither did I go anywhere near the glaring inconsistency between His goodness I read about in His Word and what had still happened to me. For all He said about never leaving or forsaking me, it sure looked like God had done so then. He had not helped me as my heart had filled with fear in that fateful moment — and judging by the searing pain I continued to carry, it seemed that a mere mortal had indeed destroyed my life.

This would change, however, almost six years later, at an unrelated altar call I had responded to during youth service. Expecting to be prayed for by the preacher, I found myself overcome by emotion as he said only five simple words to me: “You have to forgive him.” I had not been thinking about it, but what was buried deep inside came spilling out at once. “Yes,” I was somehow able to pray as I knelt at the altar, “Yes, I will forgive him.” I discovered later on that I was able, for the first time ever, to talk about the assault without shame or sting. God had healed me.

He then began answering the questions I had not dared to ask, revealing dimensions of His truth to my mended heart. Had He not protected me from experiencing sexual trauma? This is what I have come to understand: God may not intervene to disrupt the free will He has given all of us — to choose for ourselves without His interference — even when people choose to hurt each other. But His promise of never leaving or forsaking us remains true, a promise embodied in the person of His Son.

Jesus suffered on this earth that we may never be alone in any of our sufferings. He is with us when tragedy strikes, and He stays with us in its wake, no matter how long the road to restoration stretches. Neither does He watch helplessly as we writhe in agony: the Jesus I know wept when the brokenness of this earth touched those whom He loved (John 11:32–35) — and then He proceeded to redeem it (Rev 21:4). He faced the ultimate forsakenness on the Cross in our place, and was returned to life to give all who believe in Him both the promise of eternal togetherness and His Holy Spirit for our time on earth (Matt 27:46; Rom 3:24–26; John 20:21–22).

That is why the New Testament writer of Hebrews can repeat with confidence the exhortations of Moses and David to trust in God and not be afraid (Heb 13:5–6; cf. Deut 31:6; Ps 118:6), because with Jesus Christ, Immanuel, God with us (Matt 1:23) is now a promise that will be fulfilled for every believer, for every circumstance, for every doubt and dark time. My Great Helper is here for the whole journey, whatever it holds. I will not be afraid.

JONK’S JOURNALS

A PRAYER
Dear Heavenly Father, I bring to You everything I hold in my heart: my doubts, my hurts, my questions. Help me to trust in You as I surrender them to You. Heal my heart as You renew my mind with Your truth. May I experience Your nearness in this journey. Amen.

JOURNAL THIS!
1. Is there something you are struggling with that is hard to reconcile with your faith in God? Tell God the truth of what you’re going through, and ask for His help.

2. Are you feeling alone or abandoned? Commit to trusting that God is near, He is with you, and in Him you will find revelation, redemption, and restoration.

KNOW THE WORD
Allow the Holy Spirit to illuminate His truths in these passages:
– Psalm 34:15–20
– John 11:1–44; 16:33
– Isaiah 41:10; 43:2

AFTERTHOUGHTS
“God’s absence is never true. His silence is not absence; His hiddenness is not abandonment. He is working for your salvation; He is working out his promises. He is keeping His promises even when it looks like He’s nowhere around.” — “The Hiddenness of God” by Timothy Keller

Listen to the sermon on Spotify

God will not give me more than I can bear … right?

Kallos Team — Mon, 29 Aug 2022 09:03:00 +0000

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

1 Corinthians 10:13 (ESV)

Life is tough. There is stress from studies and exams, as well as delicate relationships and conflicts that can leave us feeling misunderstood and alone, the list goes on… and all these on top of a worldwide pandemic that we still have no solution for! Sometimes, it feels like more than we can bear.

A verse that is often used to encourage us in times of stress is 1 Corinthians 10:13. The first part of it says, “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability…” This is often interpreted to mean that the trials that we go through are not unique to us, and God will never give us more than we can handle!

In the past, whenever I faced a difficult and stressful period in my life, I sought comfort in this verse. Believing that God would not give me more than I could handle, I would tell myself that I just needed to grit my teeth and go through it. So, I would tell myself, even if you are going through a difficult time, it can’t be THAT bad. You should be able to handle it. Don’t give up.

But sometimes, things wouldn’t get better for a long time. Doubt would creep in. Am I weak? Why is it so difficult? Does God really know what I can bear? Didn’t He promise…? Why am I going through this?

THE PROBLEM

There are at least three problems with this interpretation of 1 Corinthians 10:13. First, if God only gives us what we can bear on our own, then we won’t need God. If all we experience in life is manageable by human strength and wisdom, then we could go through life without needing to turn to God for help.

Second, our lived experience tells us that God does give us more than we can bear! The interpretation that God does not give us more
than we can bear offers merely a contrived sense of comfort to people going through deep personal grief or extreme challenges in life.

IF GOD ONLY GIVES US WHAT WE CAN BEAR, THEN WE WON’T NEED GOD.

Last, but not least, the Bible affirms our lived experience as it gives us multiple examples of people given more than they could bear. Joseph was a victim of human trafficking by his own brothers and faced many difficult trials because of that (Gen 37–40). Daniel was maligned and abandoned to a den of ravenous lions (Dan 6). Job lost all his possessions and his children, and was struck with loathsome sores all over his body (Job 1–2). Surely these are more than any human being could bear!

THE CONTEXT

The misunderstanding of 1 Corinthians 10:13 arises from the belief that the word for temptation can also mean trial or testing. This belief is, in fact, true. The same Greek word peirasmos that is translated as “temptation” in 1 Corinthians 10:13 is often translated as “trial” in Galatians 4:14, as Paul speaks of his bodily ailment being a trial. In the context of his letter to the Galatians, Paul is clearly using the Greek word to refer to a trial or testing — a challenging and difficult situation.

But just because the Greek word for “temptation” could also mean trial or testing doesn’t mean that it must always mean trial or testing. We need to look at the context to determine what exactly is meant in the verse. First Corinthians is Paul’s letter to the church at Corinth to address the problems that they were struggling with, including divisions in the church (1:10–17), moral issues (5:1–6:20), and problems with how they were conducting the Lord’s supper (11:17–34). And, here in chapter 10, Paul starts with the negative example of Israel in the wilderness to warn the Corinthian Christians not to be like them — don’t “desire evil” (v. 6), don’t be “idolaters” (v. 7), don’t “indulge in sexual immorality” (v. 8), and don’t “put Christ to the test” (v. 9) or “grumble” (v. 10).

This leads to Paul telling the Corinthians in verse 12 not to be complacent: If you think you are standing, be careful that you don’t fall! It is in this context that verse 13 then begins with “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.” This verse gives the reason why the Corinthians should not be complacent — it is because the temptation that they faced was a common one!

THE SOLUTION

But what is this common temptation? It is the temptation to sin. Or, as Paul has explained, the temptation to desire evil, to worship idols, to indulge in sexual immorality, to put Christ to the test, and to grumble.

Reading verse 13 in context, we see that “temptation” here refers not to trials or testing, but to temptations to sin. Paul is telling the Corinthians that they too face the same temptations that the Israelites faced in the wilderness.

Then what is the promise in the verse? It is not about being able to bear the suffering that we experience. Rather, the promise is that our faithful God gives us the ability to resist temptation. This is reiterated in the next part of the verse, that “with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” Also, 1 Corinthians 10:14 only makes sense if we interpret verse 13 correctly. Since Paul is warning the Corinthians about the temptation to sin, it makes sense for him to conclude with a call to action: “Therefore … flee from idolatry.” If instead he has been assuring them that God would not give them trials that are more than they can bear, why would he then ask the Corinthians to flee from idolatry?

RATHER, THE PROMISE IS THAT OUR FAITHFUL GOD GIVES US THE ABILITY TO RESIST TEMPTATION.

SO WHAT?

For those of us who are going through challenging times, there are many other verses in the Bible that remind us that God is with us despite overwhelming circumstances, and that we can endure suffering with God’s help. First Corinthians 10:13 is not one of them. We need to recognise that God sometimes gives us more than we can bear, but with Christ, we can overcome. If you are going through a challenging time, perhaps the psalms would be a good starting place to find comfort. In them, we may find solace in the desperate cries for help, the raw reflections, and the trust that the psalmists express in God (e.g. Ps 13; 46).

However, 1 Corinthians 10:13 does speak to those of us who are facing temptation — which is, well, all of us. Have you ever said or heard someone else say, “I’m just an angry person — I can’t help it,” or, “The reason she is so proud is because of her upbringing — we cannot blame her”? Or perhaps, “The temptation I face is just too strong — you won’t understand”? This verse tells us that there is no excuse to sin, because God gives us the ability and His help to resist temptation.

In other words, 1 Corinthians 10:13 is not an unrealistic encouragement for difficult times, but an assurance that comes with a piercing challenge: God has given you the ability to resist temptation, so exercise it with His help and don’t succumb!

Dear Kallos: I often feel like I’m not ‘American’ enough for the Americans, and not ‘Singaporean’ enough for the Singaporeans.

Alina Teo — Mon, 29 Aug 2022 08:27:00 +0000

I go to an international American school, but I live in Singapore. I often feel like I’m not ‘American’ enough for the Americans, and not ‘Singaporean’ enough for the Singaporeans. I just feel like I don’t fit in anywhere. What should I do? -Confuzzled and Lonely

dear Confuzzled and Lonely,

My heart hurts hearing you share how you feel about not fitting in. Straddling two different cultures and trying to find one’s footing in either isn’t easy. Perhaps you may identify with the term ‘Third Culture Kid’ (or TCK for short), which is used to describe someone who has been raised in a culture different from their parents’, or from the culture they are currently living in. I want you to know that you aren’t alone in feeling this tension as the world grows increasingly globalised.

As an encouragement to you, the beautiful thing is that in Christ, all of us are ‘third culture’. When we become Christians, we are issued a new identity, a new passport and nationality, so to speak! We have citizenship in this world, but also in the kingdom of heaven. We have a foot in both cultures, not quite fitting in completely in either. My hope is that as you journey with other Christians in your community, you might find that nationalities and cultures don’t have to matter as much as it currently appears.

There was a time in my life when I was in a new environment. I felt lonely and unsure about how to go about making friends. One night, I told God my fears and asked for something on my heart. I prayed that He would bring me good friends — ones that I could laugh with, cry with, and be myself with. I also prayed that God would bring friends who had the same values as me, so that we would spur one another on in our faith. To my amazement, God answered beautifully.

These same friends are still my closest friends more than 15 years on. Among them are ones who became my bridesmaids and ones who have journeyed with me through motherhood. I urge you to do the same — to pray and trust that God will bring friends who can cross these cultural boundaries and be the encouragement you need.

Dear sister, nothing is ‘wrong’ with you. God made you — precious, special, and loved. I truly believe that as you keep praying and trusting God, making the effort to get to know more people, and choosing to be a good friend to others first, you’ll start to feel less out of place. It will take time, so don’t rush it. These friends may not even come from school but other circles, like from church, your neighbourhood, or elsewhere!

Above all, remember that God is your closest friend, and He is always walking with you through the good and the bad. Take heart!

Is it OK to doubt God?

Jackie Hwang — Sun, 31 Jul 2022 16:05:00 +0000

When you have doubts about God and His word, it isn’t necessarily a bad thing. JACKIE HWANG digs deeper into how we can wrestle with our doubts in a healthy way.

It is a natural for any of us to ask questions about things we do not understand and to express doubt about things that do not make sense to us. However, when it comes to our faith in God, what should be our proper response if there are things that do not make sense to us? Is it OK to doubt God?

Before we address this question, it is important to know that doubt by its nature is an open-ended process of investigation. As an open-ended process that is not limited by a predetermined answer, how it is handled is more important than whether it was right or wrong to have the doubt that started the process in the first place. When we handle the process of doubt well, it may initially challenge our faith in God, but will eventually deepen our faith. When we handle the process of doubt poorly, it will harden our hearts to any reason or even to God’s own voice to restore our faith.

To help us understand how the process of doubt can turn us toward God or away from Him, let me use some biblical examples to illustrate the differences. These examples will also show that the Bible indeed condones and encourages a process of doubt when we approach doubt constructively.

Biblical examples of constructive doubt

In Mark 9:24, there is a seemingly contradictory cry of “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” from a man who asked Jesus to heal his son. The man dealt with his struggle of doubt by turning to Jesus for help, instead of turning away from Jesus. The man was honest with Jesus about his doubt. Because of the man’s honesty, Jesus took the opportunity to strengthen his faith by healing his son.

Even though David doubted God, he turned toward God in honesty and humility.

This encounter between the doubting father and Jesus shows that being honest with our doubt and bringing our doubt to God humbly is a constructive way to handle our doubt toward God.

David, a well-known Old Testament figure, wrote many psalms dealing with his doubt toward God. Psalm 22 is one of these. It starts with these words in verses 1–2:

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish?

My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer,

by night, but I find no rest.

Even though David doubted God, he turned toward God in honesty and humility. This attitude allowed David to work through his doubt and led to a deeper faith in God (Ps 22:22–31). In fact, these same words of doubt in Psalm 22:1 were also uttered by Jesus when He hung on the cross, revealing the human side of Him during a time of pain and suffering (Matt 27:46). These biblical examples show us that constructive doubt is the willingness to be honest and to turn toward God even when we doubt Him.

Biblical examples of destructive doubt

Unlike constructive doubt, destructive doubt is defined by arrogance and denial of God’s actions. An example of this is found in John 9, which tells the story of Pharisees who refused to believe in Jesus’ authority even when there was indisputable evidence that Jesus had healed a blind man. The Pharisees insisted on nitpicking the details of how Jesus healed the man to discredit Jesus (9:13–34). Because of their refusal to believe, Jesus rebuked them for their spiritual blindness (9:39–41).

Another example is found in the Old Testament book of Malachi, which describes the rebellion and arrogance of the Israelites toward God. In doubt, they claimed, “It is futile to serve God. … But now we call the arrogant blessed. Certainly evildoers prosper, and even when they put God to the test, they get away with it” (Mal 3:14–15). Though their doubt might seem similar to David’s in the earlier example, they differed from David since their arrogance did not lead them to turn to God but led them to reject God’s offer of showing His goodness and faithfulness to them. Not only did they turn away from God in arrogance, but they also denied their wrongdoing when God confronted them (Mal 3:13).

Constructive doubt leads to growing faith

The biblical examples above show us that having doubt is not a problem in itself. Instead, how doubt is handled is the key. When we deal with our doubt honestly and humbly by turning toward God, such a response conforms to biblical teaching. And if we have the proper safeguards against arrogance and against an outright rejection of God, a good dose of doubt can actually be very helpful to grow our faith in God.

A constructive approach allows the process of doubt to make our faith an active faith that is always asking questions and seeking a deeper knowledge of God. In fact, this active faith is much better than a dead faith that is afraid to go deeper with questions about God. So, we should encourage one another to have constructive doubt that will take us further in our faith in God!

Christian music became my idol

Kallos Team — Sun, 31 Jul 2022 16:00:00 +0000

Growing up in a family of musicians, I have always been a music nerd. But as I immerse myself in music, not all of it is entirely godly. Some of these songs feature explicit lyrics, or cover dark themes. As a result, I once decided to challenge myself to only listen to Christian music and no secular songs for two months. I did this because I wanted to centre myself in godliness and honour God with the songs I consume.

The first few weeks of the challenge started out great. I was so inspired by God and His word that I wrote two songs in a span of two weeks! However, something happened in school that made me feel discouraged and hopeless. To get through that difficult time, I used Christian music to make me feel better.

Weirdly, as much as the songs I listened to encouraged and assured me that God is with me, I felt far from God. It was ironic that the more I tried to fill my mind with godly songs to hear God’s words and truth, the less I could hear Him speaking into my life.

The challenge backfired because I realised that each time I went through difficulty, I turned to music instead of turning to the One who holds all things together (Col 1:17). Instead of taking my worries to God, I depended on the song lyrics and ‘feels’ of the song to lift my spirit. It took a while for me to realise that Christian music had started to become an idol in my life.

Christian and worship music can build faith, and is a way to praise and glorify God. But I learned that it can’t be my go-to in times of need.

To overcome this, I simply tried to lessen my music intake. I swapped my usual evening runs with music to evening prayer walks in the park without music. While on public transport, I spent time talking to God instead of being distracted by music. Finally, once again, I knew God was lifting my troubles off my shoulders each time I surrendered them to Him in prayer. I used to think of music as my transportation and workout companion, but the real fact is that I was never alone. God watches over me every day.

To all reading this, I thank God that Christian music has helped many of us to shift our focus to God and speak the word of God into our hearts. But let us not forget that He alone is the One we should run to for our every need!