How do you tell someone that you used to have a crush on that you don’t like him in that way anymore? Especially since he now returns the feelings? - Stuck
dear Stuck,
Thank you for asking this question. It can be quite a tricky and awkward situation, but possible to navigate. Truth be told, feelings come and go. Perhaps you might have found someone attractive at first, but after some time, that attraction diminishes. I suppose that’s why people term such a feeling a “crush”.
Although feelings may change, given that the guy has reciprocated your initial feelings, you do need to consider how to tactfully share that your feelings have changed so that you keep his pride in place and not further hurt him.
Are you able to pinpoint why you may not be romantically attracted to him anymore? Give it proper thought and if possible, share it with the guy in a gentle manner. Don’t just find excuses to get yourself off the hook. Instead, be honest and tell him how your feelings have changed. By giving it due thought rather than brushing him off, you are giving respect to him as a person. And if there isn’t an obvious reason, that’s fine too. Find a way to tactfully share that your feelings have changed. It’s always tempting to avoid an awkward situation, but it would be more honouring to communicate your feelings clearly. Obviously, it isn’t the nicest thing to hear that the person you are interested in is no longer interested in you, but I hope he would take that over a lame excuse.
Our emotions may be fickle, but remember, in all things, God is our constant, so stay rooted in Him.